-+)(+- May 12, 2024 -+)(+- A Quiet Playlist For Him~♥ ______________________________________________ Space = Skip Song The rain in the background is for the first image, idk how to get it to stop, but I like it so I'm leaving it... ______________________________________________ Story time.. (it's a long one) So..It's been a while since I broke up with my ex, and my Bestie: @tayscrazy, has been shipping me with one of my other friends (for the sake of his privacy I'll just Call him J) who is a boy taller than me and about a year younger than me too, since the beginning of last school-year it's been a thing. Now the entire school does, including my mom. Recently, I have started to notice just how loving and kind J is, granted he's a child at heart with the look of a 14 year old. Still immature ofc, but when I send him little texts asking what he would do If he saw me cry or if I was hurt, he was so sweet and mature about his answers. I'm pan, meaning I love you for your personality and not just your looks, over time I saw more and more of how adorable and loving he is. I sometimes tape letters to his locker door or cram little gifts inside his locker, he allows me to hug and snuggle him whenever I want.. Once, on J's birthday, I gave him a gift of all his favorite things with 3 notes combined to be one...and as I passed Him in the hall, I pulled him aside for a hug, and gave him a kiss on the cheek then ran before he could say anything. after that people kept asking me if I was dating J and asking if I actually kissed him and why.. that all stopped after a while and people have been leaving me alone a little more. Now sometimes I'll ask J about giving him small kisses and pecks when were a little older, and he will always reply with "I'm sorry, but I only want Kisses from someone if i'm dating them" It always makes me smile though it hurts a little bit, he likes that I at least ask if I can him give kisses. but, I wanna know if he liked it, or if he is bothered by my affections at all, I'm scared, scared of loosing my friend, and scared of being rejected entirely... I do know that J does have someone else in mind, but it doesn't mean that I cant still love him right? J says he likes knowing that someone actually cares about him, he likes my hugs, and he still enjoys hanging out with me. I hold hope deep in my heart, that someday, he'll be the one to hug me and show me affection. I really hope that he's in the same classes as me next year, so I can be with him a bit more and steal more snuggles from him..♥