*reshared from Jul 10 2024* me when the gacha phase hits again ~read before spamming flag like 10 times~ ○✦○ I thought I had all the time in the world and I did I thought I could do anything and I could have Nothing ever started or finished it just was There was no past or future only now. But that was then, before time entered the picture. They say it’s supposed to heal, supposed to ease grief, supposed to let you let go, but that’s not what I’ve seen. It’s just a parasite slowly eating me form inside, reminding me of all the mistakes I made All the mistakes I wish I could fix Reminding me of how I failed in so many situations Every failure I wish I could undo And then it just gives me those same situations again. The only thing that ever changes are the names and faces I’m looking at. I truly can’t tell anymore if it’s trying to do is give me a second chance when all I hear is Time just taunting me, over and over, saying, "яємємвєя тнαт σηє тιмє? яємємвєя нσω вα∂ℓу уσυ ∂ι∂? ωнαт ιƒ ωє ∂ι∂ ιт αgαιη? ωну αяє уσυ sтιℓℓ sυ¢н α ƒαιℓυяє? ωну ∂σ уσυ sтιℓℓ тяу ωнєη уσυ кησω ιт's αℓℓ gσιηg тσ вє тнє sαмє? " But I think the real reason I find it so disturbing, is just for what it is. The passage of existence. It’s rubbing in the fact that life will go on even when you don’t. It won’t wait for you. It doesn’t care about you. And frankly, I wouldn’t care about it either. Except... there are sometimes where I just wish I had been remembered and not let go of so easily by the people I really did care about. But you know what? I’m happy for them happy that they finally found a life And happy that they’re happy without me. "sσ нσω єχα¢тℓу αяє уσυя σℓ∂ ƒяιєη∂s?" Fine, last I remember. Their family came over and said hi. "вυт ησт тнєм. sσ нσω αвσυт уσυя ηєω ƒяιєη∂s? σн sσяяу, ι ƒσяgσт, тнєу'яє уσυя ραsт ƒяιєη∂s тσσ ησω. ∂ι∂ ι ƒσяgєт тσ sαу 'нαρρу gяα∂υαтιση'?" I don’t understand what you’re trying to say here. They’re still my friends I still know them I still will keep on trying To talk to them again. And maybe finally, one day, I’ll- "уσυℓℓ ωнαт? ωαкє υρ? яєαℓιzє тнєу ∂σηт ¢αяє? яєαℓιzє тнєуяє ησт sυρρσsє∂ тσ? яєαℓιzє уσυяє ησт єιтнєя? ℓєт gσ αη∂ мσνє ση נυsт ℓιкє тнєу ∂ι∂." I find it funny how you’re the one to talk when you’re the one still following me around still haunting me still taunting me but hiding like the coward and quitter you always were but I’ll never be. I wouldn’t stop caring even if I lived the same day over and over, I would still try. I won’t just let go I won’t just move on like nothing ever happened. I’ll stay right here for years if I have to to prove you wrong. I’ll hold on, to every memory to every moment to every emotion And maybe finally, one day, I’ll- I’ll be able to save them. Save them from you. Save them from themselves. Save them from me, this time. "уσυ кησω уσυ'яє נυsт sтυввσяη, яιgнт? ∂єℓυsισηαℓ, єνєη." And you know you only speak false questions, right? That still wouldn't change anything. You're only wasting our time here, so just stop. “αℓяιgнт тнєη, ι sєє нσω ιт ιs. sσ ιℓℓ sтσρ. вυт ι нανє σηє ℓαsт яєqυєsт ƒσя уσυ. α gαмє. α νєяу sιмρℓє σηє, яєαℓℓу.” No one can win a game against you. But that includes you too. You're risking losing your own game? “єχα¢тℓу.” What are you planning here? “уσυℓℓ ƒιη∂ συт σηє ∂αу, ιƒ уσυ тαкє тнє σƒƒєя. sσ, αяє уσυ ωιℓℓιηg тσ ∂σ sσ?” ... Yes. I’ll play your twisted game, Time. And I know I won’t win, But you’ll lose. Because I accept that life will go on, even without me it won’t wait for me it won’t care about me. But I’ll make sure that while I am here, the people I care about do. I’ll make sure that I won’t make the same mistake a third time. I’ll make sure that I won’t let you bother me anymore. Because I know I’ll have all the time in the world I’ll be able to do anything. There’ll be no start, no end no past, no future, just then, one day. And there’ll be no more use for you. Time isn’t needed in Eternity. So until then, sure, I’ll play your little game. Anyways, let’s start. No time to lose after all, right? I just finished my turn It’s your move now. ○✦○ Poem, art, and code- Art made in Ibis Paint X Text generator-