he's a 10 but ___ He has no sense of humor He runs up the stairs on all fours. He claps every time the plane lands. He’s always late. He never helps you with the chores. He’s super clingy. He doesn’t have a driver’s license or a car. He brings up his ex in every conversation. He follows a bunch of random Instagram models. He’s cheated on someone before. He acts like a baby when he doesn’t get what he wants. He’s always talking about himself. He’s disrespectful to his parents. He refuses to post pictures of the two of you on social media He vapes all the time. He tries to start the wave at sports games. He only uses Snapchat to communicate with you. He’s a SoundCloud rapper. He wants an open relationship. He’s 4’2”. He’s always on his phone when you’re together. He snores like a fog horn. He’s terrified of butterflies. He’s always “too busy” to hang out. He’s a total mama’s boy. He drives like a NASCAR driver. He picks his nose in public. His place is a complete mess. He chews all of his plastic straws. He doesn’t wear socks. He doesn’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re.” He films himself trying viral dances on TikTok. He starts every conversation with “wyd?” He always gets stuck in the revolving door. He thinks he’s hilarious, but he’s just mean. He smokes cigarettes. He always forgets your birthday. He checks out other people in public. He expects you to pay for everything. He chews with his mouth open He has a really annoying laugh. He only texts you after 10 pm. He listens to “alpha male” podcasts. He doesn’t know how to ride a bike. He’s bad at managing his money. He doesn’t use deodorant. He calls his parents “mommy” and “daddy.” He constantly interrupts you while you’re talking. His ex is still his phone’s background picture. He disappears for days on end. He only communicates with GIFs. He flakes out on your dates. He sticks gum under the table. He constantly talks badly about other people. He’s overly protective of you. He has a picture of a fish he caught on his dating profile. He never puts the toilet seat down. He doesn’t know how to swim. He says “no cap” to everything. He drives a really nice car. He’s never seen Star Wars. He never goes to the doctor or the dentist. He doesn’t watch TV or movies. He only replies every 2 to 3 business days. He’s bad at math. He confidently sings the wrong lyrics to every song. He has no social media accounts. He’s genuinely super funny. He doesn’t like to cuddle. He has an Android phone. He reads the news every single morning. He’s super organized. He has a buzzcut. He doesn’t like to dance. He always asks to split everything 50-50. He doesn’t use emojis. He gives you foot massages. He kisses your forehead. He has tattoos all over his body. He tips waitstaff well. He’s a great photographer. He has a great taste in music. He loves talking to you. He carries spiders outside instead of killing them. He can cook really well. He’s incredibly loyal. He’s super kind towards everyone. He gets your sarcasm and plays along. He has a really cute dog. He knows who he is and what he stands for. He validates your feelings and makes changes based on them. He’s mature and humble. He makes sure you walk on the inside of the sidewalk. He’s a great listener. He’s super talented at anything creative. He’s always early. He’s incredibly kind to animals. He values your opinions and goes to you for advice. He remembers everything about you and what you like.
srry its supa ! long
