hi. hiatus info and stuff i guess. as of writing this, i'm taking a precollege program and i won't be able to do much outside of it and my russian studies, so i'm going to keep up with this semi-hiatus. (why russian? because i'm still fixated and i do actually want to get better and want it to become a special interest. also because of the next point) since late may and honestly mid march too, my mental health have been horrible and deteriorating further and further. i've held out enough to pass sophmore year with all As but that's about it. and i have what is basically mini college from 9 to 5 now (more like 7:30-6:30 due to transportation). i will not go into details unless you ask and i trust you, which is not many people, but stuff happened and you can probably tell because i'm typing a lot more bluntly and dryly than i used to. it's not really contributing to the mental health thing as far as i can tell, but i've found out my body is sort of... messed up and trying to get even worse, specifically my eye. i've known about it for a few years but it's only getting progressively worse and i don't know what it is. honestly at this point, i would not care if i lost it. i'm honestly hanging on by a thread on some days and i feel like i want to delete everything and break off everyone. i am not kidding when i say russian is sort of a lifeline for me rn. i don't know where my art special interest went but it's not making me feel better in the slightest. i have a lot to do, but i'll try my best to do what is owed of me. if i owe you something, please tell me in the comments. i will try my best to get it done as soon as i can. if for some reason any of you all are curious, you can ask me about my college thing, let me infodump about russian, or ask me about my eye or the rest of me that is deteriorating. i just won't talk about the stuff in my head. anyways yeah. до свидания, hopefully not for forever. 8.15 edit: hi. i'm still feeling horrendous. hiatus will continue
