idk man i've been feeling so down lately i feel like i spend most of my time tryna make other ppl laugh and make others feel happy it js drains me so there's no time for me to catch a break and idk why but i hate myself so much for depending on the validation of other ppl to determine how i feel and how my day goes i try to not care but its freaking hard not to care when theres ppl left right and centre telling you how you should look, act, behave, believe in, what music you should listen to. idek when or why i started to care i used to be such a carefree person who didnt care what others thought of me and now im overthinking every social interaction i make, wondering if i said too much, did too much, acted too weird or wtv. and this goes for my own ppl as well. im constantly being told how i should live my life as a black person and i feel like its so dumb. so what if you're black and listen to taylor swift??? that doesnt make you any less black its your freaking preference but if you do then you're 'whitewashed' and 'not embracing your culture' BRO STHU AND LET PPL DO WHAT THEY LIKE. im so sick and tired of being fed crap all the time and letting it get to me and the annoying part is idk how to stop it or solve it im js a freaking people pleaser and have become incapable of making my own choices srry if this counts as yap i need to blow off some steam and i dont wanna break anything so ye
