MAJOR TW!!! attempted unal!ving of self + implied $h PROCEDE WITH UPMOST CAUTION ┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ .┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ⋆˚ ┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ .┊ ┊ ⋆˚ ┊ ┊ ⋆˚ ┊ ┊ ⋆˚ ⋆˚ ┊ ┊┊ ⋆˚ 【ｐｒｅｌｕｄｅ】 The moon trickled through the cracks of the apprentice den, this scene wasn’t unfamiliar to Skvaderpaw. For as long as he’d been in Riverclan he’d often found he couldn’t sleep. Night was a horrid time, no one else was awake for him to distract himself. So he just… fell. Fell into the well worn tracks at the back of his mind. The tracks he tried to ignore, tried not to listen to. Most of the time he could do it, get away from that place. His means probably weren’t always the greatest. He flinched as he ran his claws lightly over the marks he hoped no one would ever comment on. His excuse of being incredibly clumsy wouldn’t fly forever. But he could get away from that place, at least long enough to sleep. Tonight however, for some reason one question wouldn’t get out of his head no matter what he did. What was wrong with him? Actually he could answer that, everything. And it would always be that way. He wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t worth it to be loved. He wasn’t worth it to be liked. Heck, he probably wasn’t even worth it to live. Then, a memory. Crashing white water. The day he was supposed to have died, right there in the river. That was where he belonged, at the bottom of the river bed so everyone could finally move on and he’d stop holding them back. That’s where he needed to go. And that’s where he went. As quietly as he possibly could, he slipped from the shadows into the chill of midnight air. He took each step with great care, if even one cat woke up it could ruin his entire plan. Until finally, finally he got far enough away from the camp he was sure no one could hear him. And he ran. He ran like never before. Following the first trail he’d ever trekked through Riverclan territory, back to the place he was never supposed to have left in the first place. And there it was, the river. That memory was so clear now. The three of them, crying out on their crumbling watercraft. Until Coneybrisk found them, brought them to safety. Well here he was again, prepared to correct his original dodge of fate. He sat next to the shore. He had nothing to lose. This was it, he could finally get rid of the mistake that was him. 3… He closed his eyes. 2… He let out all his breath. 1… He dove. Currents crashed into him, whisking him around through the crazed water. They say before you die your life flashes before your eyes. That was a lie. He saw nothing, just felt the sting of water against his vision. It was probably better that way. He breathed in the river, letting it fill his lungs. Letting it overtake him. Until at last, everything went black. It was finally the end, right? Wrong. soooo, yeah... thats the intro uhhhh. my poor goober. anyways, in the comments i have some threads set up for me and to finish this up where heartpaw will save sky :thumbs_up:
ONCE AGAIN, PROCEDE WITH CAUTION TO THE SUMMARY summary... wip
