This song. This song reminds me of all my versions of myself, my personas. They all add up to nothing. At the end of the day I’m just me. I wonder, what would happen if I didn’t exist? If I never made it? I think those melatonin gummies were really calling me. I was gonna use them to cause a sweet death. Literally and figuratively. But I wouldn’t have made all those wonderful people happy. I wanna live. Just so I can be there. For all of you. I’d like to give younger me a hug. She didn’t deserve any of this. She deserves to live. I hope she knows that. I wish that she never searched up how to tie a certain knot…and ended up getting links to hotlines. I have an empty hand, someone needs to hold it. And what’s most depressing. I know a person I know only online for 6 months and trust him more than a brother I’ve known for years. He never calls. Only when necessary. He wouldn’t love me if I ever came home with a girlfriend But the people on here get me. I sound like a coward and a crybaby rn, but it’s true
Music: Homunculus- Trickle
