Warning: Ultra cringy sound effects. For the sake of your sanity and that of everyone else nearby, turn down your volume before you begin. (Really, ultra cringy everything.) ⮚Controls⮘ [Space] to begin game P1: [A] and [D] to move your noob left and right {or to select a hat in the menu} [Q] or [Z] to swing your wooden sword [E] or [X] to perform the Blocking Dance of Invincibility P2: [←] and [→] to move your noob left and right {or to select a hat in the menu} [N] or [1] to swing your wooden sword [M] or [2] to perform the Blocking Dance of Invincibility Happy April Fools' Day!
The name is a portmanteau of "neophyte" and "fighter", which is perfectly fine wordplay when said out loud, but I can't figure out how to spell it in a way that doesn't look stupid. Oh well. Thanks to @Koog_Bot for helping me with the death sound. It's amazingly atrocious. And also just amazing.
