⭒. ──. ˚₊‧ ✩ ‧₊˚.── .⭒ life was without meaning. everything came and passed by. new things formed and old things seemed to have disappeared. it was how life worked. that azaleawaltz knew. but it had always seemed to have brought her down. now, she couldn't bother to look into the apprentice den. couldn't sleep soundly, waking up from things that seemed impossibly real to be a dream. her warriors ceremony. it was supposed to be a happy passage into adulthood. a sign that she had become someone strong, someone who was now able to provide for her resident clan. yet, it was filled with grief. grief of her lost sibiling. reopened wounds of her adoptive father who was long father. her kithood before she moved to the clan. life seemed to pass by without hope. it had become a desperation. something that was forced. and there was nothing the gods would do. they'd only sit by and watch from their twinkling castles within the glittering skies. to them, she felt she was just a pawn. a pawn in the circle of life. she ran. she walked through the town where her siblings used to live, before they turned to loner life and found a way to escape the horrors they faced. they felt a lot worse. then why was she crying? she was weak she was pathetic that's who she is. a weak pathetic warrior who can't do anything to save someone's life, and returned to riverclan camp. ⭒. ──. ˚₊‧ ✩ ‧₊˚.── .⭒ azaleawaltz has ( minor ) ptsd and is officially fearing her demise! she'll avoid the apprentice and warrior's den as much as possible, and will sleep in a small nesting she built under a tree for the time being. she'll sleep restlessly every night and sometimes doesn't sleep at all. this takes place a few days after her warrior's ceremony due to the guilt of losing family members and not doing anything about it. ⭒. ──. ˚₊‧ ✩ ‧₊˚.── .⭒