Naming this project was hard. And starting it is even harder:') (edit: sharing this project was proved to be even harder than that) So um I'm not "leaving"- the accurate way to phrase that would be "I've been leaving." I'm here to explain why:) I'm not leaving because of drama- I'm not leaving because anyone is making me mad or annoyed. Just to be clear This isn't my thing. Drawing, creating characters, designing, writing backstories for characters... these aren't what I want to do. I don't feel like spending time on it anymore. Although I'm not leaving out of frustration that I can't draw well, it's true that I'm not artist material- and I always felt like that. I've been seeing more and more time gaps between my drawings- I can't find motivation to draw and being real, I feel ok about that. It's not art block. It's just I no longer feel like drawing. That leaves me with no reason to linger on this site. Being here, being active, requires me to post and without drawing (or coding) I have nothing to post. I might still draw fanart when I feel like it, now that I have a bit of experience with art, which is proof that my time here hasn't been wasted. I'd watch people leave before and it SUCKS. It's sad looking at an account that's no longer active, just a page, empty and sort of... lifeless, y'know? I hate to see people leave and now I'm doing this- becoming that inactive account and I feel terribly sorry about it. I've imagined my own account turning inactive and it feels awful. There's still stuff that I want to draw... but I don't FEEL like doing them. Leaving is the right thing to do- the choice that ensures me that I'm no longer wasting my time on this thing that's just time consuming and brings no joy and satisfaction. I can use all this time to manage my priorities in life, like education and my social life. Will I be active? Nah. Not the posting-every-week-and-liking-projects-everyday active. Will I check in once in a while? Sure. Probably when I'm bored in class Lastly, my time here was amazing. Most people I encountered has been nothing but kind and supportive to me and I was amazed so many times by all the positive feedback I recieved. Infinite thanks to all those who were kind to me. I won't forget this, trust:) Special shoutout to my friends, alie, adder, floof, light, and many more- for making my experience so extra sweet and memorable. I'm eternally grateful. Ugh, there are so many stuff that I'm gonna miss. I hope yall will miss me;') This was phrased so many times in my mind and now I finally typed it all out. Now that I'm finally getting this clear, it feels like such a relief! I'm NOT glad that my account will die but I am DEFINITELY glad that now I'm being honest with myself. I can stop convincing myself that art is my thing and move on, to find the actual thing I'm good at. There are thousands other ways I can phrase this project, but my fingers are getting sore and my bladder is about to explode so let's just end this right here, shall I? Peace out, yall!! I love you guys!! <33 -Jelly:) 2025, 3/14
