enjoy some writings from the iliad that tell of a depressed Achilles book xviii […] and Antilochus arrived, swift messenger, to Achilles and finding him in front of his straight-horned ships he sensed within himself what had happened. And Achilles said, troubled, to his magnanimous heart: «[…] Yes, the strong son of Menetius is dead, madman! And I had ordered him to repel the devastating fire and return to the ships without daring to clash with Hector». While he was thus reflecting in his mind and soul, the son of the noble Nestor came near him, shedding hot tears and bringing back grim news […] He spoke and a cloud of anguish enveloped him. With both hands he gathered burning dust and poured it over his head, disfiguring his beautiful face, and dark ash stuck to his fragrant tunic: he lay stretched out for long stretches in the dust and with his hands he dirtied, torturing them, the locks of his hair. The maids taken prisoner by Achilles and Patroclus screamed in pain as they rushed to the hut around the wise Achilles: they all beat their chests with their hands, each one's limbs fell apart. On the opposite side Antilochus shed tears as he held Achilles' hands, who groaned in his proud heart, fearing that he would cut his throat with the sword. The venerable mother, sitting in the depths of the sea with her old father, heard his fearful cry. book xviii part two [Achilles to Tethys] «[…] but what delight comes to me now that my dear companion, Patroclus, is dead, the one whom I honoured more than all the companions equally to my life? […] I too have no desire to continue living and being a bystander to men unless Hector loses his life before me, pierced by my spear paying me the price for having plundered Patroclus Menetiades». book xviii (i think?) part three The son of Peleus began the thick mourning by placing his exterminating hands on his companion's chest and groaning like a thick-haired lion whose cubs were being stolen by a hunter from the thick undergrowth and he regrets having arrived too late and seized by a furious anger crosses many valleys sniffing out the man's tracks. book xix Thetys arrived at the ships with the god's [Hephaestus] gifts: she found her son who was shedding sharp sobs while embracing Patroclus. book xxii [Achilles] «Untearful, unburied lies Patroclus stretched out beside the ships, whom I will never be able to forget as long as I am among the living and my knees move nimbly, and if in the house of Hades the dead are forgotten even there I will remember my beloved companion […]» book xxiii […] the soul of the poor Patroclus came to him, completely similar to him in stature, in his beautiful eyes, in his voice, and he wore similar clothes around his body. He stopped above his head and said to him, «You sleep Achilles and you have forgotten me! Bury me immediately so that I may pass through the gates of Hades! […] And then I want to tell you another thing and recommend you to do: do not place my bones far from yours, Achilles, but together with mine as we grew up together in your house since Menetius brought me among you as a child because of that sad murder when I happened to kill the son of Amphidomantes, foolishly but unintentionally, furious over a dice dispute. Then Peleus the knight welcomed me into your house and raised me with great care and appointed me your squire. And so let a single urn contain our bones!» Replying to him, Achilles, with a spring in his steps, said: «[…] Yes, I will grant your every wish, I will satisfy all your requests. But now come closer to me so that, embracing each other, we can at least satiate ourselves for a moment with bitter tears!» He said and so he reached out with both arms but did not grasp him: like smoke the soul flew under the earth squeaking. Achilles woke up astonished […] book xxiv The gathering broke up and they all dispersed towards their own ship, thinking of enjoying food and sweet sleep, but Achilles wept remembering his beloved companion nor did he allow himself to be overcome by sleep that bends all; he turned on one side and the other regretting the virile strength and the feeble impetus of Patroclus and all the pains he had unraveled and suffered with him crossing wars of men and cruel waves: immersed in these memories he shed hot tears, sometimes lying on one side, sometimes supine or face down.
sorry if it doesn't make sense, i copied everything from the iliad in italian until 1am (no joke) and then translated it into english later THEY MAKE ME SICK ah and then i had all this rubbish written in a notebook and this morning i brought it to school and my classmate saw it and said «is it the divine comedy? but do you know it by heart??»