I am sorry that my first post in almost 4 months has to be something this serious, but it has come to my attention that people still aren't that comfortable with me after everything I have done late 2023 to now. I will be having an in depth talk about all the stuff I remember happening, not really an apology, just a discussion. I also will not beg for forgiveness since, let's face it, some of this stuff is unforgivable. Firstly, in October 2023, that is where it mostly began. Before then, I was already making some very derogatory and sexual jokes for a while due to the people I was around at the time making me think it was all okay to do. However, I thought it would be a good idea to rage bait the AYS community and speedrun getting blacklisted. I did this successfully in 16 minutes by creating a cover of a song from a Friday Night Funkin' mod about people unaliving themselves. I also later down the line would send videos to people and in 1 or 2 servers of people doing this as well. To this day, I have no clue why I thought any of this was okay to do, and I am doing everything in my power to make sure I never do that again. I am sorry to everyone I sent gore to, and I promise I will never do it again. 2nd, a little bit after this all went down, the scratcher Paka_Mzuri ended up gaining some great traction for the fact that he posted some very inappropriate stuff, containing underaged characters doing... explicit stuff. He obviously got tons of hate, and still does to this day. I found his disco (I can't say whole thing because Scratch dislikes it) server through a scratch comment he posted, and I joined it while in a call with jk_studioss and Pokinyoko. Pokin leaked the server, and it ended up later becoming what is currently known as 'Paka_Mzuri's Classic Island'. I remain in that server to this day, which several people don't support. There was a reason for this however; to get him to realize it was wrong. For the longest time, I thought I had succeeded in doing this, but recent events have made me realize that he hasn't changed much. I still try though, since I know he is capable, he's been capable of doing better, and I have talked to him about everything. I am only hoping for the best, but everything he did in 2023 was really bad and unforgivable, and he knows this. As much as I never should've associated with him for this stuff, he is still an amazing friend to me, and he is one of the few people who I know understands me at least a little bit, not fully, but a little. Third, the big elephant in the room, my horrible sense of humor with sex jokes. I still make them to this day, I will admit it. They used to be a lot worse then now though. Some of them involved very sensitive topics, and some of them were things that a human should never even consider saying. I look back at some of the things I have said sometimes, thinking about how much weirder I was, and how I don't think I have changed one bit. I consider giving up trying almost every single day. I have no idea why something this simple is so difficult for me. I don't want to get to deep into mental health though on scratch, so I will leave it at that. So in conclusion, I screwed up lots over the past nearly 2 years, and I will continue to do so, but I still hope to be better than how you guys saw me at first. I understand though if you can't, since this is all very bad. Sorry once again to everyone I have affected and may affect in the future.
