hii everyone . i know this isn’t what you might have expected or what i did either . but it is what it is . i’m taking a long summer hiatus . for you who don’t know what that is , its a holiday break . summer is coming ( although it feels like its been here since may ) and scratch would just get in the way . my family are taking me on two holiday trips each one two weeks long , so i won’t have much time to be on scr . as well , i normally have an entire week of no social media in the summer . we turn off the internet , apart from the occasional check up on messages for the adults . its tough , but honestly fun . i’ve got abt a week left of school before the end of school . its going to be tough to post and stay active in that time . we’ve got tons of exams , tons of prep for next year and tons of other stuff . scratch has also become really stressful . sometimes i have no motivation to post anything and find myself scrolling through endless ‘project ideas’ projects . it has affected my mental health both positively and negatively . i have anxiety and it is harsh . my friends at school sometimes tease me and make fun of me , which doesnt help me . scratch is also negative in that way . since my first day on scratch , everyone has been moving . its hard though, following one person after another . hard to quite keep up and i’m sure most of you feel the same . but scratch has lifted me up through my darkest hours . through the times my friends thought my smile has evil and creepy ( even gross ! ) and left me out , you all told me i was pretty , kind , funny and ‘just so lovely’ . here’s the thing : my parents don’t know i’m on scratch . they don’t really want me on it , or talking to people . they know my brothers on it , but not me . i take care of myself to stop them finding out . i have a confession as well . i actually did have an account before this . it was called @MademoisellyEnvy . i always felt awkward when i saw my old projects because they were really cringe , but popular . i deleted my acc because of family matters . then , just a month later , i made this account . within two weeks i have racked up 50 followers , and it kept on growing . i can’t say i haven’t been grateful , but on @MademoiselleEnvy , i had 83 followers by the time i deleted my account . it felt like stealing </3 i suppose i’m known for being friendly and sweet here on scratch , and it’s true irl . my friends can bring me down though . i’ve got a tough life and i will be using the summer to catch up with all my friends who need to be careful with me from now on . i’ve always known i was going to have to do this , which makes things worse . i really need to focus on school work for this last week or term . i’m in the school choir and got three solos : we’ve got twenty three performances left , which drag into the summer holidays! we began our first end of term performances in MAY . at school , i’m known for being smart . i’m called the ‘human calculator’ by everyone in the school . thing is , i don’t even like maths . i like literature , art , choir and acting , which i’m equally good at ( though acting is my strong point ) . but since i’m eight years older in maths according to my maths teacher ( rolls eyes ) , i’m the mf human calculator. people call me a nerd . ‘i don’t care’ would be a lie , because i really do care . my friend has their school tablet wallpaper as an gacha girl saying ‘i’m not a nerd, i’m just smarter than you!’ it really hurts . they’ve never been called a nerd , only they have called me a nerd serveral times . and a bookworm . but hey ! i like books , what can i say ? i really am feeling PUB3RTY right now . i’m scared . i know everyone will be expecting each other to d8 next year , and i’ve got my eye on this rly cute boy ! which is why i need a break over the summer . i’ll be back after summer , probably in august or what-not. doesn’t get me wrong : i’ll miss every one of you . to my friends / idols , i’ve got a message for you all in the project , just for you . no one else . just you . to everyone else , i’ve also got you all gifts and pieces of advice . no one will ever forget you , for you all are just as important and beautiful as the rest <3 you don’t need to be friends with me before this project to comment , you know . if you want to be friends , keep me in your mind . i do really love you all . but sometimes you’ve got to put yourself forward before the others . that’s what i’m doing . keeping my peace <3 see you in august / september <3 xoxo giselle THIS IS NOT A LEAVING PROJECT EVEN THOUGH I5 MAY SEEM LIKE IT IS . I WILL BE BACK LATE AUGUST / EARLY SEPTEMBER
