i’m so tired. like completly worn out from this batle insde me that never seems to end. every time i look in the mirror i don’t even recognize the person staring back. this body feels wrong like it’s someone elses skin i’m stuck in. it dosent fit. no matter what i do it never will. i’m supposed to act talk and be this way but that just isn’t me. and it hurts. not just a little but deep down in a way that never realy goes away. every morning i wake up wishing i could just disapear or hit reset and start over somewhere where this pain dosen’t exist. but it’s real. there’s no pause no way out just this wight i carry every second. then there’s my family. the people who are suposed to love me no matter what. but they don’t see me. they act like i’m making it up or just looking for attention. they say things like you don’t need to change or why can’t you just be happy with who you are. like pretending it’s not real will make it go away. but it dosnt. they don’t get what it’s like to live in a body that feels completely wrong every single day. they don’t understand how hard it is just to say i’m trans when it feels like the whole world is aganist you. sometimes i’m angry at them for not seeing me. sometimes i’m angry at myself for still hoping they might. but mostly i’m just exausted. exhausted from fighting inside myself and fighting with the people who should be there to suport me. i’m not asking for a party or for everyone to suddently understand everything. i just want to be seen really seen as who i am. not a mistake not a phase not something weird. just me. is that too much to ask? becuase right now it really feels like it is. i wish people understood this isn’t a choise. it’s not something i picked to make my life harder. it’s who i am. and it’s lonley when the people who should love me don’t even see me. i just want to feel safe in my own skin. to live without this constant pain and fear. to be able to say who i am and have it mater. to have a family that stands with me not against me. but right now it feels like i’m fighting this battle all alone. and that hurts more than i can say. please remember to always love yourself, no matter what.
youre honestly way more important than you probably realize. like the stuff you do every day even the little things adds up and makes a huge difference for the people around you. without you things would just feel off or incomplete. you bring something unique to the table that nobody else can replace and thats huge. sometimes its easy to forget or doubt yourself especially when things get tough or overwhelming but trust me you matter so much more than you give yourself credit for. people rely on you in ways you might not even notice and your presence alone can change how someone feels or what happens next. so even when you feel small or like youre not doing enough youre actually doing way more than you think. the world and the people in it wouldnt be the same without you doing your thing. dont ever doubt how important you really are youre kind of a big deal whether you see it or not.
