okay these losers have been infesting my brain wrinkles help I kind of love them annnd I'm trying my best to keep it family friendly since I'd love to post this on scratch if it seems lq it's unedited plus it was 2am when I wrote this okay uh yeah ----- It is six in the morning. It is far too early to be on a train. And yet here I am. Just me and Anubis, like always. I wondered where I’m going this time. The city, that’s right. I was told I was off to some city this time. Horizon. I reached down into Anubis’s carrier, retrieving the little sphinx cat to let him settle into my lap. I fixed his sweater over his back. There are people on the train. There are far too many people on this train. They are surrounding me. They are suffocating me. I let out a silent grimace as some man brushed my legs as he passed. I clutched my notebook tight in my grasp. It is the last thing I have left of him. My father. He died when I was eight. Work accident, or something. It doesn’t matter. All I know is that he’s gone. At least he’d had the decency to die first. I can’t say the same for my mother. One day she was just gone. No note. No contact. Just silence. It was for the better, I try to tell myself. A young girl squeezes up beside me. She couldn’t be any older than five. Where were her parents? I tried to look around, but the sound of her squeaky voice drew my attention back to her. “Why doesn’t she have any hair?” She asked bluntly, regarding Anubis with wide eyes. I shifted uncomfortably. It wasn’t that I disliked kids, but simply that I didn’t know what to do with them. “He’s a hairless cat. He isn’t supposed to have fur.” I answered simply, sneaking another quick glance around the fellow passengers. The girl scoots in closer to me. I am aware of her against me. I want to move away, but where could I go? She’d trapped me against the wall of the train. I felt myself tense up, rubbing a hand down my cat’s neck in an effort to calm myself. “Can I pet her?” She asks, reaching out with stubby fingers. I move my hand quickly to block hers, wincing at the feeling of her sticky palm. “Please don’t,” I plead quickly, and seeing the confused look on her face am quick for explain. “He’s an emotional support cat. He helps me calm down in public.” She opens her mouth as if she’s about to ask another question. Whatever she might have said is intercepted by the call of a boy much older than her. “Abby! Leave that poor guy alone!” He marches right up to us, grabbing her wrist and tugging her down off the seat. He flashes me an apologetic smile. I am aware of my heartbeat. I am aware of my breathing. I am aware of my lazily put together outfit and of my messy hair and the acne on my face. His smile is what I first notice. His teeth are not a perfect white, but it is warm and welcoming nonetheless. I see his eyes, dancing with flecks of gold and brown and green. He is tan and his hair is a stunning shade of brown, running long and messy just over his shoulders. I think he looks marvelous. He pats Abby over her shoulder, not once taking his eyes off me. I feel nervous under his gaze, but of course, what’s new? “Go back to Ma. Tell her I’ll be jus’ a second.” He murmured warmly. He has a Southern twang that I can’t help but take a moment to appreciate. She scampers off, seeming excited with this new mission. He shakes his head as she is gone, a small chuckle escaping his lips. His lips. I try not to focus too much those. “Sorry ‘bout that. She gets rowdy when she’s been sittin’ too long, y’know?” I nod quickly. “Oh, yeah. Totally.” I scramble for an adequate response. No words seem worthy of this boy. He seems amused at me, but his laugh does not sound like one of cruel intentions. It’s sweet. “I’m Aster. That’s my sister, if you haven’t figured that out already. I ain’t no kidnapper, I swear!” I laughed politely at his joke, muting myself with a hand. My laugh felt suddenly strange and I was quick to silence it. It was only then that I realized he’d been holding out his hand, presumably waiting for me to shake it. I grab it quickly. I was holding his hand. It was rough and calloused and his grip was like that of a father’s. He had wonderful hands. He titled his head as we withdrew back into ourselves, still grinning. “You talk, poet? I like your little notebook there. Whatcha workin’ on?” ----- continues below
continued from above ----- I nodded, clearing my throat weakly. “Yeah. I talk.” I’m not sure how I managed to squeak that out. I looked down at his question. Anubis curled up comfortably in my lap and I focused my attention of the geometric shapes of the spiderweb pattern in his sweater. “It’s nothing too cool. Just a story.” I murmured quietly, growing self-conscious of my work. “What’s it about?” I glanced over to Aster. He seemed to be genuinely interested. This confused me. My mouth felt dry. I didn’t seem to be able to answer. He patted my shoulder. “You good? You don’t gotta tell me if you don’t wanna.” I didn’t shy away from his touch. His hand didn’t feel overwhelming. It felt grounding. Comforting, and warm. I nodded. He chuckled again, softly. The sound felt like a gift to my ears. I selfishly wanted to keep it for myself. “This seat taken?” He motioned to the area beside me. He wanted to sit beside me. I felt my eyes widen slightly. I shook my head, absolutely mystified as he settled next to me. He propped his head up on his hand, elbow rested against his knee. He watched me with a small grin. “Got a name, poet?” He asked, meeting my gaze. I nodded. He laughed. “What is it?” I didn’t answer. I expected him to get up. Walk away. I wasn’t worth his time. I knew that. But he stayed. “Okay then. I’m gonna call you Poe. All good?” I nodded again, quickly looking out the window as to not seem like I was staring. How could I not? But I didn’t want to freak him out. I didn’t want to lose him, not yet. He leaned against me, putting his head up on my shoulder and looking down to Anubis. My breath caught in my throat. He was touching me. His body felt warm. His breath tickled as it rolled over the back of my hand. His hair brushed at my neck. I couldn’t imagine anyone else touching me in this way. He didn’t seem like anyone else. So this was okay. “Live ‘round here?” He asked suddenly, shaking me out of my daze. I shook my head. “No. I’m going to Horizon. You?” I really don’t know how I got so many words out. “Yeah,” He nodded. “Rivercreek. Stupid name, ain’t it? Rivers and creeks.. same thing, aren’t they? ‘Least, it’s close enough. Don’t gotta say the same thing twice. No place called ‘Treebush’, so…” He trailed off, clearing his throat awkwardly. I missed the sound of his voice. We sat in a content silence for a few minutes. The train slowed to a stop. I heard the brakes squeal against the track, the high-pitched sound rattling against my skull. “This is my stop.” Aster murmured, picking himself up off my shoulder. I thought I detected sadness in his tone. I shook the thought away quickly; I was probably just overthinking it. He made no attempt to move, merely looking me over yet again. A boy paused by our seat. He resembled Aster in a myriad of vague manners, though in terms of age seemed several years older. He laughed at him. “Dear god! You’ve already got yourself a new boyfriend?” Aster shoved into this boy as he scrambled to his feet. “Shut up, dumb[---]!” Seeing Abby tucked behind the older boy, I assumed the two to be related. Brothers, most likely. Aster turned back to me with a small sigh. “You got a pen, Poe? Can we talk later?” Surprise rattled me to my core. I nodded quickly, handing him my pen and notebook, open to a blank page. He scribbled something hastily before handing the two items back to me. I watched him as he bounced off the train, waving to him from the window. He turned his bright smile onto me from outside, waving back until he was no longer in view. I glanced to what he’d written as the train started moving again. I furrowed my brow at the sight of an address. I’d expected a phone number. Perhaps an email. Not from Aster, I guess. Hang on a second. Did his brother say boyfriend? I rolled the exchange back through my mind. Yup. He’d definitely said boyfriend. It must be a joke. Right, a joke. There’s no way someone like him would have a boyfriend. Right?
