(Part 1) Past and Present - TSS SRP

Instructions

There wasn’t a lot to do in starclan other than to think, and thinking is something that Kraken had done a lot of over the past-.. However moons it had been since his untimely demise at this point in time. How long has it been? Five moons? Six? What was the point in even counting? Knowing the passage of time wouldn’t rewind it for him. Nothing would. Nothing could. The best he could do was try and enjoy his afterlife. He wandered the starry plains and forests, he hunted and tasted the finest fresh kill claws could bring, he swam in waters that were cool and clear, he talked and listened to other cats, listening to stories of clan pasts from long before he was ever dreamed. But most of the time? Krakenvirtue was on his lonesome, often sitting by a clear pool or under the shade of a tree, letting his mind take him far from his incorporeal body, where his eyes would glaze over and stare into nothing for countless amounts of time, and take solace in it. So, yeah. Lots of time to think. And think Krakenvirtue did. It seemed that all he really did was think. Of the past, the present, and impossible future too. He dreamed of the life that could have been. A long, prosperous life as one of seaclan’s most devoted warriors, ended by a far more peaceful death than the one he was granted, perhaps as an elder, surrounded by family. Perhaps a mate to call his own, perhaps even kits. Oh, how Kraken would have loved to have been a father… He mused on the life that he had now, or rather, the *after*life he had now. This was truly the end of the line, wasn’t it? A beautiful, peaceful place where souls could spend- however long it took till they faded away. Kraken should be happy.. He *knew* he should.. But he wasn’t. He just *couldn’t* find it in him to be happy… The longer he stayed here, the less what little he did in his rather uneventful life mattered even less… And perhaps, that is why he reminisced about his life the most. Thinking back to every little event and detail, committing each and every one of them to memory. Most of the time it was about his life in seaclan. The few moons he spent as a warrior, his apprenticeship, his kithood. Hunting in the refugee reef, finding hermit crabs in the shifting sands.. Precious moments spent with his adoptive family. His brother, his precious older brother Luminescentgleam. His sister Twilightabyss. His father Seajellyfish. But with each passing day, each moon that Kraken spent in his own mind, the farther back he looked within his memories. Farther and farther, till he finally reached the very beginning of his life. A time that he had long since buried and put behind him. A time before he was found upon the beaches of seaclan by Luminescent and Twilight, before he was taken in by Seajellyfish. A time when he was not called Krakenvirtue. Or Krakenpaw. Or Krakenkit… …A time when his name was once Epi. … He had a different family then. Family bound by blood, not that it made his family that was not lesser by any means. The details were fuzzy, it all having been so so many moons ago, but he remembered them, no matter how much time he spent whilst alive pushing the memories down and to the side, but they were there. He remembered still, and he remembered well. He remembered his sister, his littermate. A spunky and sassy little kit with deep purple fur and icy blue eyes named Hadal. Oh how they used to be inseparable in the few moons they were together, then again, back then there was no one else to play with other than one-another. They were clanless. The children of a loner parent. And he remembered that parent. His dama. Meso. With soft purple fur and eyes that were just like his. He remembered their worn and weary features, how frail and skinny they were, yet the love and kindness in their eyes were unwavering. He remembered the den they slept in, in a corner of the sunken slopes far out of the way of seaclan patrols. He and Hadal spent most of their time hiding within the den while Meso went out to hunt and find food.. He didn’t realize back then just how dangerous the sunken slopes were, infested with dangerous aquatic life.. Is that why when Meso did return, they made them eat quickly and took the bones far away from the den? Is that why whenever he and Hadal were allowed to play outside, Meso always had an anxious, weary look in their eyes, as if scanning the slopes for danger to pull them back inside at a moment’s notice? Was it because of the danger that sharks posed..? …Or was it for another reason entirely..? Krakenvirtue remembered his once-family well… …And he remembered the day that he lost them. … He was only two moons old. Just a little kit. *“No one will bat an eye at that one,” The tom scoffed as he directed his emerald green eyes towards Hadal in cold indifference, and Epi could see the way she whimpered and cowered behind their dama’s tail, “her fins are long like mine sure, but that means not that she’s mine…”*