I REALIZED I CAN NEVER BECOME A PRO VIOLINIST, OR EVEN JUST A GOOD VIOLINIST IN SCHOOL. so basically i was in orchestra and my teacher was reminding us how we need to round our fingers on the strings. WHICH, I THEN REALIZED, I CAN'T DO. I HAVE TRIED. BUT MY FINGER IS TOO NARROW. I DON'T HAVE A LARGE FINGER(FINGER PAD? FINGERTIP? IDK WHAT IT'S CALLED) LIKE A LOT OF PEOPLE DO (at least the more advanced kids do). WHEN I TRY TO ROUND IT, THEN MY NAIL (ALREADY CLIPPED AS FAR AS ITLL GO) IS TOO LONG AND I CAN'T PRESS ON THE STRING. er, i CAN, but it's so much harder and doesn't even sound good. this explains why i can't really do vibrato AND WHY I CANT ROUND MY PINKY ON MY BOW and why my notes are always so bad (ESP ON TWO STRINGS BC MY FINGERS HAVE TO BE FAT ON THE STRING FOR ME TO ACTUALLY HIT THE NOTES). AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. IT'S SO SAD CUZ AS I SMALL SMALL KID I REALLY WANTED TO BE ABLE TO PLAY THE VIOLIN CUZ I LOVED THE SOUND OF IT SO MUCH. I STILL REALLY LIKE IT BUT NOW I REALIZE THAT IT WON'T BE POSSIBLE TO FULFILL THESE DREAMS. i also really wanna play electric guitar and maybe drop violin but I THINK THESE STUPID FINGERS (even though i like them looks-wise) WILL MAKE THAT IMPOSSIBLE TOO BECAUSE OF THE HAND PLACEMENT ON GUITAR. my old music teacher said my fingers are thin and are thus considered pianist fingers. (is that all i'll ever be </3) LIFE IS SO DUMB
i accidentally unshared it BUT UH ITS BACK IG
