Sometimes I feel like I don't exist, everyone at school ignores me, doesn't notice me in class. When I talk to someone i'm finally relieved to talk to someone but it seems like they don't care, I hate when people say "I didn't mean to...." yes you did just shut up. So many people spread rumors abt me and I just deal with it and then I have to go home just to be more neglected and write so much in my notes app. No one cares to see how i'm doing, I'm doing terrible I just hide it, I hate making ppl upset. I have so many panic attacks and no one is there to help, no one cares. I struggle everyday, I hate waking up, I hate me, I hate the fact i'm so annoying, I hate the fact I'm so quiet, I hate the fact that no one talks to me. I'm always in so much pain physically AND mentally, I only have Lizzy irl, I also talk to some people at lunch but I feel left out. I always delete videos and pictures of me. I hate looking in the mirror but I also hate makeup. I spend the most time in my bedroom, locked in there wishing I was someone else. maybe likeable, if you actually knew me you would hate me too just like everyone else, I have major trust issues so I barely trust even some friends I have, I also have mental illnesses and I might lose my vision as I get older, oh how much I love having cataracts, turners syndrome, and astigmatism, with a mild heart condition </3 at the age of 6 months I have 4 eye surgerys to save my vision. i'm so tired. AND found out my friends "struggle" but their literally not your 9 get over it, if you can't handle ts at 9 then your not gonna get through life (i'm a babysitter)...i'm dumped by countless people, pls don't report this it's helping me by writing feelings out. UPDATE : last night my parents were yelling at me and I'm grounded till Christmas for my grades and apparently my mental struggles are an excuse ? no there not and now i'm being put in therapy