Yes. I'm scared. And I'm not afraid to admit it. I've been through this once, and my heart broke. But again? You hold them in your hands, but it's hard to believe. I want to fix it. Their sad gazes. Their broken hearts. It's so plain to see. It's in his smile; I can see it clearly. It's in her eyes; she's gone through too much. I believe you're still good. I know it for a fact. My heart shattered last time, but you were there to pick up the pieces. I don't want that to happen again. Tears fall as I write this, my heart still aching. I know they're in your hand right now, and I can't wait to meet them one day. I can't wait to see what you're going to do through this baby and its parents. <3 I trust you, Lord. Give me your peace.
March 8, 2025 My brother and sister in law had just told my family that they were expecting. I cried happy tears that day. Fast forward to May 2025 and my brother and sister in law had just told us that the baby’s heart had stopped beating. Ever since then, I’ve struggled with anger. I was angry at God, angry at my family and just not my usual happy self. Jump to September 2025, my brother and sister in law just told us they were expecting again! Millions of emotions hit me. Joy, confusion and fear. I didn’t want to go through that heartache again. I ended up going back to God and since then, my life has been better. I’ve been able to find his joy in everything and his peace is also there. I’m able to be a better daughter, sister and friend. I thank God every day for that baby and the lessons they taught. I know I will see them again one day but until then I can have peace knowing he rests in the arms of Jesus. https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/1156455019 Thank you everyone who has supported me! Big shoutout to my irl friends Ailey and Logan who were there to help me through the tough times. Love you girlies! Also thanks to my brother Andrew and sister in law Clara! You both are true warriors of the Lord!! -AllyAuthor-
