jumping straight into it. I've figured out I've been confusing being demiromantic with something else..I have emophilla. Emophilla is a non-diagnosable "disorder" in which a person tends too seek romantic relationships without actually being in love just to fill the void of being lonely. All my life I thought I just didn't have the ability to be in love easily..I have a mental disorder that just wants me too be in love and be loved..I haven't dealt with that in about a year after getting with my husband and being genuinely sick in love with him but I never knew what love felt until I met him. The day I called him for the first time and I heard his voice my chest hurt. He said hi really excited yet nervous and I thought I was dying..I texted my friend (at the time) and asked why I felt like I was gonna pass out. They said I probably had a crush but every other time I had a "crush" I didn't feel like I was gonna faint just from the sound of them talking. I remember the day I sat on the phone with him for 6 hours and watched him play a game and rant about it..I sat silent and listened to him giggle and watched his camera..stared at him, watched him smile feeling like a complete weirdo..Then I got the confidence to say I liked him and he said he'd liked me back as well..Then we got engaged, then we got married and next thing I knew we were celebrating our 1 year anniversary.. I may have dealt with this mental state..but sometimes just thinking about the man that made me smile even after everything I've been through..I appreciate never being in love before this. I'm so happy he gave me this opportunity..I love you, Kenneth. I know you or no one else may read this..but know I will ALWAYS love you
definition of emophilla: Emophilia is the tendency to fall in love quickly and frequently, driven by a desire for the rush of new romantic connections rather than a need for love to combat loneliness. It is also known as "emotional promiscuity" and is associated with rapid, intense romantic attachments that can lead to impulsive or risky behaviors. These behaviors include ignoring red flags, being unfaithful, engaging in unsafe s3_x, or even perjuring oneself for a partner.
