Art for opal, even though they are never online!! I’m sorry. I miss you, opal. It hasn’t been long since you’ve been gone, but I still feel like I haven’t grasped the fact that you aren’t coming back. Every day is lonely, and I feel like there’s no purpose in getting up in the morning anyway. I don’t want to seem clingy but I really miss you and I want to see you again. I don’t think I’ll move on, because you’re my best friend. I don’t want to be with anyone else, because you were the only person I could feel comfortable around, share my feelings with, and be myself with. I’ll have to make it without you and I don’t know if that’s something I can do. I want you back here. And I know that it’s not goodbye forever, but for a while it will be. Chances are, you won’t see this, but opal, I love you a lot and, I want you to know that I miss you and want you back. I hope I can see you soon but you’re so far away. I really don’t think I’ll get over you, no matter how hard I try. I love you opal, please see this. Every day when I walk into that miserable school building, I see your empty desk where you once would have sat. I have your stickers on my desk, just to remember what once was, but sometimes I’m not sure I even want to remember, not because I don’t like you, but rather because of the pain it brings me. I miss you and I know you won’t even see this but I just really, really, really want you here again. I feel delusional, like you’re coming back soon, but you never will. It’s like I’m going insane, always looking for you but I won’t find you again. I love you opal. I’m running, looking for you, but my run slows to a walk when I remember you’re never coming back. I want you to come back and stay forever, and be with me until we graduate school. You come back, but then I wake up and remember I’m not going to see you again. One day, I’ll see you, but for a while it’s goodbye. I really am pouring my heart out to this, even though this will get buried and you’ll never see this. I really am sorry for venting, but right now, I need to. I love you opal, I do. And I’m going to have to make it without you. The only reason I’m alive is you and some other people I know. I couldn’t stand you being told that I did it. So I’m staying clean and alive, but it’s really hard without you. I miss you. I’ve said this again and again but I feel truly insane. Like you’re only gone for a bit, and you’re coming back again soon. I LOVE YOU OPAL and I really can’t manage to say bye. I don’t want to. I don’t want to HAVE to. It’s just something I can’t do. I don’t want to say bye.
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