it hurts. when i feel sad, or angry, or scared, or unloved, i feel like i can't show it or it will bother people. i feel like my opinions don't matter and that i am just a waste of space. in church, i learn that jesus loves us as we are, but it is hard to accept love or affection. when i was younger, i was bullied, and my reactions only fanned the flames. because of this, i put on a mask so that no one could ever use my feelings against me. now that i am in junior high, i am trying to peel of the mask, but it has been there for years, and feels stuck. i hate it, but it is habit, and it's hard to change. i hope that in the future, my mask will be off and away, never to be used again. but it will take time, and i am not sure if people will accept me as i am. but still, i will keep trying.
