Alright. So, the Chair would trek eastward from Fogmoor to try and catch the sun as it arose. As the Chair makes his way through the quiet Spindlewood, he happens upon an old Spindletree stump, and observes it fondly for a moment. He then continues to Weeper Lake, where he finds a statue of a woman hunched over, peering into the water. Around the statue is a circle of 11 flowers. Said flowers suddenly burst out of the ground, their stems wrapping up the Chair before hardening and darkening as the petals wither and fall off. The Chair’s now stuck in a cage of sorts. Ent then ENTers and calls to Thrine that it found an intruder. Thrine arrives and immediately identifies the Chair as a Crownbreaker. The Chair claims that he left the Crownbreakers and wanted to see if Skull King needed a financial advisor. Thrine sees right through the lie and demands the filthy Crownbreaker speak the truth. The Chair then states he’s taking a break from the war to try and uncover a mystery about evil robots from inside the sun. Thrine remarks that that lie was even worse than the first one. Ent asks if they should hit him with something, and Thrine explains it’s of no use; the Chair can redistribute the blow of any blunt force applied to him. They instead suggest Ent use its [CRACK] grafted core to show the Chair what getting broken feels like for once. Ent proceeds to blast some energy at the Chair that causes a ripple of splintering cracks to split open all over the Chair’s body, which appears to be very painful. Ent asks if it should finish the Chair off, but Thrine recalls that Specca had shown some interest in the Chair’s makeup, and they should instead take him to the operating room since he’s already been cracked open. The Chair then interrupts, joking that his current cracked state is more painful than the time he came home and found all his fancy china shattered in the icebox. He rambles that they were really expensive and he carelessly left them in the icebox while they were full of water. The water froze and expanded, shattering them. This gives Thrine a very evil idea. They tell Ent to throw the Chair into the lake so they can freeze it and expand the water in his cracks to open them even further (Thrine really hates Crownbreakers). The ends of the vines making up the Chair’s binds and cage have already hardened, so Ent simply extends the non-ripened bottoms of the stems until they’re dangling the Chair’s cage above the lake. Thrine shoots some sharp blades of ice into the vines, dropping the cage bit into the lake. Just as the Chair makes contact with the lake’s surface, however, he redirects all his kinetic energy out one spot, which launches him away, shattering the hardened vines. The Chair skips all over the lake in very unpredictable bounds as Ent and Thrine give chase, but he ultimately outsmarts them both, getting Thrine to accidentally freeze the water inside Ent and Ent to accidentally bind Thrine up in vines, which get frozen as well. The two end up falling into the lake and bob back up in a little iceberg. The Chair finally skips back onto land, and sighs in relief. He then turns to Thrine and Ent in their iceberg, announcing that they fought honorably, and he’ll remember the battle whenever he uses his fancy china, which is not, in fact, broken.
The Chair then makes his way to Wellspring Waters, and I stops for a while to soak in the spring to try and fix his cracks. Boiling water loosens wood fibers and makes them more bendable, so I figured he could repair himself somewhat, but not mend the cracks fully. As for what else he would do at the spring, I didn’t actually plan it out. I thought maybe he could do something with an old mushroom hermit, but I didn’t have any specifics in mind. After that, the Chair finds himself in the Deep Bog, which is crawling with creepy little Revenant monsters, as well as a few player cameos. In order to get through the bog so he can reach the easternmost corner of Pendia, the Chair uses some moss and one of those bridal veil mushroom caps as a disguise to fit in with the creepiness of the other Revenant guys. However, he winds up getting caught in a crowd that leads him into the chapel. Everyone in the crowd stands at attention, awaiting orders from Lady Nightshade. Lady Nightshade distributes various militaristic tasks between sections of the crowd until everyone leaves but the Chair, who isn’t sure what he was supposed to go do. Lady Nightshade notices him standing there alone and coldly asks if there’s a problem. The Chair, thinking quickly, replies as though he’d been insulted, stating that there is, indeed, a problem. Lady Nightshade is taken aback somewhat by his angry tone. The Chair questions if she had somehow expected him to go do menial tasks like some sort of common worker. Lady Nightshade asks what’s so special about him, and the Chair scoffs, repeating her inquiry in a mocking tone, as though the question was too dumb to even validate with an answer. The Chair knows attempting to make an excuse to leave would snap Lady Nightshade out of her confusion, and she’d likely then order him seized. So, instead, he goes perhaps a bit too far in the opposite direction, and demands she take him to Skull King at once. Lady Nightshade asks if the Chair’s gone mad, and the Chair replies that “mad” doesn’t even begin to describe it, and if he isn’t speaking to Skull King within the next 30 seconds, he’ll see to it personally that Lady Nightshade is thrown into the boiling acid lake. Lady Nightshade states that she’s not aware of any boiling acid lake, and the Chair quickly retorts that that’s because nobody’s been stupid enough to cross him and end up in it, as he shouts for the last time to speak with Skull King. Lady Nightshade finally acquiesces and brings him to Skull King’s throne room, to which the Chair then tells her to give them some privacy. She turns to leave, but pauses for a moment in suspicion of the Chair, though ultimately decides to just leave. Skull King asks who dares disturb him this late at night (it’s like 4 in the afternoon), and the Chair basically dials the gaslighting up to 11, since he knows Skull King isn’t exactly “all there”. The Chair tells Skull King he should already know why he’s here, and Skull King asks how in Pendia he would know. The Chair proceeds to make various claims of his identity that all seem to contradict one another, and lists nonsensical tasks Skull King was apparently supposed to do until Skull King is completely disoriented with no idea what’s going on. The Chair then explains that he knows the king is confused, so he’ll cut him a deal. If Skull King just gives the Chair his crown like they 100% discussed earlier, the Chair will figure everything out for him and he can just go back to bed. Skull King sighs in relief and happily gives the Chair his crown before thanking him and returning to his nap. The Chair then leaves the throne room to find Lady Nightshade staring him down with a soaking wet Thrine and Ent, as well as many other Revenant members standing behind her. Ragothor rips off the Chair’s mushroom and moss disguise, and Lady Nightshade catches the Skull King’s crown as it flies off. She examines it for a moment, asking what the Chair intended to do with Skull King’s crown. The Chair admits he kinda just thought it’d be funny to steal. The Revenant members are not amused, and we slam cut to the Chair being strapped up in Specca’s operating room, uttering a simple “darn it”. Well, I’m out of space again, so we’ll have to end off the story there for now. I may make a third part, but maybe not, since I don’t think anyone’s actually reading these. So yeah.
