The Argument: Me: SKIES – I know you’re going to read this, because I know you speak German... or at least I think you do. Um, ANYWAY: THIS IS A FORMAL AND OFFICIAL DECLARATION OF WAR! OUR BATTLE WILL BE LEGENDARY! THE VICTOR WILL BE REVERED FOR A FULL TEN HOURS BEFORE HISTORY LEAVES THIS TALE BEHIND FOREVER! Come on now, SKIES – are you a coward?! Skies: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ {Wa—how did you even know I speak German? You know what? That’s completely beside the point. OK, LITTLE KITTEN, LET'S GO! You're about to get declawed and dethroned! Come on—*me*, a coward!? *You're* the real chicken—you've got absolutely no right to run your mouth here!}♥ Me: Literally everything about you practically screams "German speaker"—whether it’s German or Latin, you are exactly the sort of person who would master one of those languages. BE THAT AS IT MAY—OKAY, AT LEAST I’M NOT A PEST! THESE CLAWS COULD KNOCK YOU RIGHT OFF YOUR FEET, RODENT! YOU’D BETTER WATCH WHAT COMES OUT OF THAT HUGE MOUTH OF YOURS! THOSE LITTLE, SHARP FANGS YOU’RE SO FOND OF SINKING INTO THINGS WON’T SAVE YOU TODAY!!!! Skies: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ {Aww, why is the little baby kitten crying out in German? Is it because you don't want everyone reading along while I verbally beat you to a pulp? Come on, let's go, bring it on—what have you got, kitty!? Aside from arrogance and the ability to always land on your feet, the very same paws I'm about to knock you right off of?} Me: I’m doing this to keep our little chat private—you pest! You won’t be laughing once you get stuck in a rodent trap! You probably think you’re incredibly cool, don’t you!? Well, guess what: You’re not! You’re just a dispensable pest! Skies: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ {Awww—does the little rodent baby sound a bit defensive already? You come storming in here with your "declaration of war" like a wet sack, only to start whimpering the moment I so much as give a single wave of my paw? "Scaredy-cat" was actually generous—in truth, you’re nothing but a fluffy dust bunny with fangs. Come here; I’m going to go ahead and just scratch every last shred of pride right out of your pathetic, bristling fur!}♥ Me: You—of all people—are talking about rodents, when you yourself are one of the biggest, filthiest rats that ever lived! And then you claim I have no right to open my mouth, while you’re spouting such absolute trash yourself? How dang hypocritical is that, Skies? I already knew you were a rodent and a jerk—but finding out you’re a hypocrite, too? That’s news to me! Skies: (っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ {You accuse *me* of hypocrisy, yet you yourself are nothing more than a wildly deluded rat. Sweetheart, I am neither arrogant NOR a hypocrite—I am simply and unequivocally superior to you in every single aspect. You are merely proof of why some animals are better off staying in their cages. Go right ahead—feel free to squeal a little louder, kitty.}♥ Me: You claim you aren't arrogant—and then you come out with something like *that*? It almost seems as if you are practically hell-bent on making me make you regret ever existing; someone finally needs to put you in your place and remind you that you are nothing more than a filthy, repulsive rodent! Skies: *has yet to answer*
