look at this pleb

Instructions

Jerald was once an ordinary man, who had a somewhat wealthy business selling various shovelwares and cool gonks or whatever people did back then. He had been suffering a health condition by the name of "Old Agitis", which was impossible to cure Jerald would not be worrying about said condition until he found 50 gray hairs in his luscious locks (behind his head). Jerald was anxious about this discovery, especially as he was only 21. He could not be leaving this early, especially since he lived with his soon-to-be wife, Ganet (pronounced like Janet). He had developed stress and was soon desperate to get the cure for his incurable condition, even if that meant through dangerous means. Few days past by, and Jerald found an old lady in somewhat old shop stand, who, without asking, gave him an old lamp(shade). "this right here, young lad, will cure that old agingitis pretty well. if ya ask it to, atleast." The witch said, ignoring capital letters. Jerald, shocked, grabbed the deal and ran away excitedly, much to the amuse of everyone in the public kindergarten the two were arranging this deal on. Now you can probably guess what happens blahblahblah he props the lamp(shade) on a desk and rubs it ('cause Jeralds' seen Aladdin before). Genie comes out blahblahblah. Jerald wishes for the cure and only the cure blahblah. Genie grants his wish Jerald spends the other 2 wishes on infinite tacos and hotdogs and all is well. ... haha just kidding the story would not end like that. Jerald gets his one wish, but immediately collapses on the ground. This is so since the Genie (bob for short) granted him immortality, as such Old Agitis happens to everyone, and no one can escape it through ethical means. Jerald's body could not handle such power, thus Ganet called the local generic hospital and the paramedics rushed him on a stretcher (which looks rather fun to jump on honestly). They called the smartest doctors on this operation as they realized Jerald's heart had been beating an excessive rate, however his blood seemed to be of an endless supply. His lungs had been of top tier condition and were still moving, even though this story was set in a time where everyone had done the very bad smoke one way or another. The doctors had to build his inner workings from the ground up, in a way that he was still immortal (cause they got paid extra to do that). They injected Jerald with oil and plasma as a substitute for blood. It took 3 and a half years for them to finally finish working on Jerald's body. Jerald had a tank of plasma and oil on his back, that had to be filled daily by drinking said plasma and oil, otherwise he would not function properly, meaning he would still be immortal, however paralyzed instead. His face however seemed to be already paralyzed, so paramedics would have to cut his face into three different parts, and connect them to a metal head that replicates a human head. His eyes, mouth and nose are mainly for show, as he does not need them anymore. Jerald does not show emotions like how a normal human being does, instead he flips one of his three panels according to the expression (he can also move each part individually, as shown). Jerald finally married Ganet, and they had a happy family, who Jerald surpassed in lifetime, as he was immortal. Such immortality can also be considered as a tragedy, as in today's time Jerald is now the remaining of his family tree, and he is not capable of making life. However, Jerald was for a time well known across the world as the "Cyborg" of the 21st century. Jerald was well known as the "Rotating Door face", which was a name Jerald did not like. He had enjoyed this fame for a while, taking photos with such celebrities such as "Celebrity name 1" or who could forget, "Pop singer", as well as "Walter White". Unfortunately this fame was short lived and lasted about 2 years until everyone had eyes on the next outbreak, "I would rather not say-19". Jerald could not be bothered less however, as he had been through a lot these past few centuries. He now lives in his two story bungalow apartment, with two of his roommates. The end.