WARNING: If you are TRANSPHOBIC, HOMOPHOBIC, or just QUEERPHOBIC IN GENERAL, get out of here and never show your face again. Also I apologize to any Christians or any other Religion if I have offended you at any point since religion gets brought out (I'm an atheist btw) The title name is to throw off anyone so it's not about Rubber Duckies sadly. ///RANT/// Okay, so imagine waking up everyday and getting ready for school right? Well I have first period PE which sucks and we have to dress out in locker rooms. Uncomfortable yes but as someone who struggles with gender dysphoria it hurts a lot. A LOT! I have to wake up every day and wear clothes underneath my regular street clothes to hide any skin, I ALWAYS wear jackets to hide my shape, I hate my hair, I hate my body, I hate it all. People refer to me as she, I remain neutral but it hurts a lot and everyday I wished people referred to me as they or he at least, anything but she, heck even neopronouns, anything is better than she, ANYTHING! Do you know what sucks more though? Coming home every day to a family that doesn't support you. Surrounded by Christians who teach bad morals that shouldn't even exist but solely because of misinterpretation. Christians I am very sorry but it's not that I dislike your religion, no it's I dislike certain followers of your faith because of this okay, this being one of the 2 reasons I am an atheist. The other reason is just solely me questioning why there is some floating dude and no proof and now this person is the reason for our existence for some reason (I own a Bible but I hide it in the closet, it's in there deeper than me/hj) Now how bad is my family??? ... I GET YELLED AT TOLD ON A WEEKLY BASIS IF NOT DAILY THAT I AM NOT A BOY, THAT I'M A GIRL They say it's unholy and I'm a sin or whatever. It makes me upset and I have to calm myself down. Something about there only being 2 genders which is not true. Btw, intersex exists as well so I don't know what my mom who works in healthcare is talking about. I HATE IT HOW THEY TELL ME THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH ME Or how they threaten to check the router- (I'm cooked with all the gay media I consume and amount of questions I've asked Google for help with gender) You know what's bad as well? The fact that earlier today, on March 15, 2026 at 8:33 pm they said when I was doing my math homework on the table my mom had said, "You know we're always your biggest supporters" I choked/coughed slightly under my breath, took off my glasses, rubbed my temple and continued to write. "With what?" I asked pushing to see if they would show their true side. "With everything. We give you food and a home to live in, love" I stopped listening there and almost cried. If I were a fool I would've believed them but I'm not cuz what I was gonna say next would've outed me and got me kicked out of the house after being yelled at. "What if I told you I was trans" I was going to say it, but I remained shut, still looking down. They were transphobic and knew it, they were just testing me... Well that's reassuring words parents /src It's not like I hate myself already both on the physical and mental level and having your AMaZinG support sure helps... ERG!!!! FDJNFDJOFBDHIBFSRWRETDBYNU Get this as well, they have made my sister transphobic as well with their little conversations telling her to not refer me as sir and the same speal about you are the gender you are born and have already successfully made herself homophobic (actually I don't think they did, the kind of crap my sister watches on YouTube did) They keep trying to make me wear make up, wear dresses and be their pretty, little, ideal, "beautiful" daughter YEAH NO If they thought I was a tomboy, close enough I'M A BOY AND GET THAT IN YOUR HEAD I'm NOT your daughter (out of 6) I'm NOT someone you get to choose how to be And certainly I'm NOT gonna let you get away with this! I planned to transition when I'm 15 *sadness I still gotta wait* I'd get a binder if I could but every time my school offers trans supplies it's always at an inconvenient time or any information with resources. Bro, I'm so upset at the world, it screwed up badly. They all thought I was gonna be born a boy like how everyone thought my dad was gonna be born a girl but NOPE, instead I am cursed to be born the opposite gender and live like that >:( And having 5 sisters doesn't help either, all my mom does is compare me to them and how I used to be so girly back then. I think my parents just call me beautiful and all other mushy feminine stuff to convince me. They're just jealous of my masculinity (yeah dad, I see you with those-) My youngest sister is THE GIRLIEST of them all and is not helpful at all. If I had the choose which sister to come out to, it'd probably be the most unexpected, not my favorite but my chilliest one, the 2nd oldest (aka the first twin, the 2nd is the one I love very dearest)
///CONTINUATION CUZ I RAN OUT OF ROOM/// Did I ever mention the pronoun pin situation as well? Well I had yapped about if before but basically it was a casual Monday and I was at the corner store with my dad cuz I accidentally ate an entire bag of beef jerky that was supposed to be for my mom so as punishment I had to buy a new one for her which is fair. I hate beef jerky btw so that day was pretty funny, anyways I'm handing cash to the cashier and I look down and see a little white circle face down. My face fell as it was a pronoun pin I made a while back and had left in my varsity jacket that had these holes in the pockets as "cool" gaps. Not cool at all and my varsity jacket ended up disappearing cuz it made me look boyish. Anyways, my dad says you dropped it and picked it up for me but saw the face up side and looked at me with a fire in his eyes. He asked me if this was true, he was about to lose his temper but cuz we were indoors next to the cashier he didn't. The second we got into the truck he started yelling at me, raising his tone and anger as he asked me if I showed this to anyone at school telling them to refer to me using They/he. I stuttered saying no and since the pin was actually a sticker, it would have lost it's stickiness (though I was gonna show the others, and maybe I should out myself tomorrow to feel better). Note that the corner store we go to is literally the CORNER store so we were in the car for 20 seconds and my joyish mood depleted as my dad told me to my mom. Long story short, both of them were upset at me, made me almost cry again and think things I shouldn't again. I thought that day sucked on November 10th, 2025 at 4:43 pm, Hahaha- The next day was hell. Also my parents must think I'm straight with all their yapping about boys and how I shouldn't date and that all the "boys will be over me and at the house" - My dad For some reason my parents also got beef with guys for some reason and just hate them in general??? Whenever I don't fit their girl stereotype, I'm called Danny Boy (It's supposed to be offensive cuz that's the name of one of my uncles) or Triney (Who was my mom's other brother, older one and was the worst brother ever according to my mom) Yeah, my parents try to offend me and I don't care. "WE DON'T HAVE BOYS IN THIS HOUSE" - My dad ... That explains a lot about what you're taking dad. You sure you ain't like me as well? /jjjj He's in denial /j Btw, even if I was born a boy or didn't identify as one, I'd still be not straight. If I identified as a girl, no joke I'd be a pure lesbian (flirted with 27 girls in March in 2023 and kissed one by accident. THERE WAS CONTEXT THOUGH-) However, regardless of my gender I'm actually Demiromantic- Fem. attracted cuz I don't want another label or I'd perish finding a not-straight label and I'd be upset if I said queer. I don't want to be straight, I'm too queer for that /silly I've also only had 1-2 crushes in my life. The first 1 was on my best friend who I've known for like 6 years (and sadly no longer see on account of moving in November of 2023) and I think maybe on another girl but it may have just been a squish or plush?? Also when I started um adolescence, I hated my body (like stated) and would say horrible things to myself every minute, not day, minute, for over a year, always pinching myself hard in my pockets, never talking to anyone. To this day I still do that sometimes and b!te myself as well and say things to myself when I'm alone letting my rage out. I punch trees. Is this me coming out??? I dunno, probably I guess but hey, this is pretty cool. Now what about trans people in general cuz my thumbnail might be misleading if I don't state now. Um, well we are like any other person, just were born in the wrong body and want to be ourselves and want to refer ourselves using different pronouns and look different. Trans people never did anything bad to you transphobes than breathe air so don't act like we did something malicious. No we are not planning the world's destruction, we are regular, normal people like you cishet people. We are cool and gay people and other queers are cool too so stop acting like we are a sin cuz *Muffles self in order to not offend anyone religious* All in all, this was just a major rant about me complaining about my parental units. And yes some of the music is queer, I like I/Me/Myself by Will Wood I/Me/Myself - Will Wood we fell in love in october - girl in red Boy Bi - Mad Tsai Notion - The Rare Occasions ABSTRACTION [Metal Cover] - og. KittenSneeze you are doomed - ???
