to others i'm sorry but somethings in the past are sometimes best to keep a monster away cuz i try everything to keep my impulses in control but cuz of my ADHD and autism I mostly forget what I was suppose to control and my impulse just do what they do and make me mess up, hurt to the touch, a mindless heartless beast and I don't want you people to go through my pain and fear what I have become cuz I want you all to like me as friends and talk, and hang out, and feel safe when you talk instead of being afraid of things I might do cuz I don't want you all to be scared of hate me cuz i'm trying every being in my body to not ever be my full true self cuz the past was my full true self but now I only show half or a quarter of myself so I don't hurt or mess up
so if you ever are uncomfortable, uneasy, scared, or anything bad when near me tell me to shut up and listen and you just explain how you are feeling against me like I said uncomfortable, uneasy, scared, or anything and I will try my best to not ever do the same thing again