sorry for so many evaluations of the self rather than genuine posts, but anyway: let me make this clear: on scratch you see the sociable side of me. i talk, i try to be funny, and i voice opinions. and i speak in paragraphs, as just about all of you know. if you need an example, the best ones would be my most recent interactions with leona. that's essentially me at the peak of interacting with someone and feeling a close bond. but when i'm offline... completely different breed. i do not talk in school. if i do talk, it's with one of maybe four students out of over a thousand, or certain counselors. i sit by myself on the second floor at lunch, half out of regard for myself and half out of respect for the fact that when i sit by others at lunch, i'm kind of just there and don't say much. i don't know how to talk to people, and when i am in some inescapable situation where i absolutely must talk, i VISIBLY struggle with the interaction. my hands get somewhat fidgety, i blink rapidly for whatever reason, and i am extremely whispery for fear that i attract attention. i have an irrational aversion for literally all attention in school, and in public generally. you get the general idea, but there's a lot more to it, really. if you were to have any questions about this sort of thing, situationally or just as a broad topic, i could answer. thoughts? how do i cope? et cetera
