Hey everyone.... as u may know, I have been feeling terrbile... uh... long story short... it's Family business...(I will add more) My Elder cousin (five children and wife) Was.... missing... im not gonna say why... this my business... He was missing for 2 months and yesterday, My mom was sad and I asked her what happened... she told me the doctors called my aunt and told her that the hospital he was in.. for whatever reason, it.. exploded and my cousin got burnt... to d3@th. um... I dont wanna say much more but just saying im super sensitive, im that one friend that is always cheery, never shows sadness... but in reality, I am always sad.... depressed.... I dont mean to be an attention seeker or pick me... but my boyfriend told me 'wanting to vent out dosnt make you a pick me or attention seeker' all thanks to my boyfriend I feel much better.... im so glad I chose him.... <3 I am so sorry I haven't been on a lot today... its just.. yeah we spoke to relatives... something happened, I had a really bad panic attack... Im still shaking... my dad massaged my head for 30 mins and my mom after that aswell... I was calm when they were giving me their (Rare) love... (I say it's rare.... it's coz... well.. ik they love me and all that... but.... they dont show it... and I get it... my sisters autism.... but im the eldest.. and most sensitive... since childhood... I have to bare everything... my parents say they only see me being successful in the future so all the pressure to make my family proud... is on me...) BUT IM A BIT BETTER NOW! ITS OK MY LOVES!!! IM SORRY IF I SEEMED HARSH TO SOME OF YOU!!!! Idk what im saying or doing... iykyk like im still in the effects of the panic attack.. and.. well.. I can say. loads of weird things.. *COUGH COUGH COUGH* I also got jumpscared by my sister right afterwards sooo that made me worse AND I hit my foot REALLY bad on the piano stand (I was playing piano) and now its swollen, red and also blue/ purple ToT
