I’m very sick currently and cannot sleep for toffee I am quite unhappy at this moment, because of my sickness I can’t do much which leaves me alone with my thoughts so I’m trying to keep myself from spiralling. Low immune system…sigh
Also I really relate to Monika, I hate that sometimes I become so infatuated with someone that I accidentally start to push my friends away, or at least that’s wha it feels like. I like that Monika’s not just a stereotypical yandere, I’m not sure whether I’d class her as that but nonetheless she’s a complex character who still loves her friends. I would never put my friends through hell even if i knew they weren’t real. Speaking of which, things usually don’t feel as real as they should for me but because I’m sick it’s become a lot worse. I hate how some sicknesses makes your body hurt, why is that? It really sucks because I can’t find any comfortable positions to sit or sleep in. I know my thoughts are egodystonic ( I know I spelt that wrong I’ll look it up later) but I can’t help still feeling guilty about it. I feel sick when I hear people say that your thoughts create your reality (haha your reality, get it?) or that your thoughts reflect your inner self, because there’s no way I would ever, ever do the things I think of. This sickness is also making my health anxiety worse.
