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uh ok more to be added later inspired by my friendo @inkbleed -=-=-=-=-=-=-= he/she/they any pronouns I’m lesbian + abrosexual Oli/Oliver brothers: @bluecat_546 + @hell0yello9090 sister: @pinkbunnehkat_90 irl friends @inkbleed @K969 I like femtanyl, spellcasting, AJR, sodikken, CG5 The fact that you took time out of your day to type that comment needs to be studied by scientists. Somewhere in an alternate universe there’s a version of you that opened the app, saw the video, thought “that’s cool,” and kept scrolling. Unfortunately, we got the timeline where you voluntarily announced your presence like a medieval town crier whose only purpose is to contribute absolutely nothing. I imagine you sitting there after posting that comment, staring into the darkness of your room illuminated only by the sacred blue glow of your phone, waiting for somebody to acknowledge your existence. Not because the comment was funny. Not because it was clever. But because deep down you know that if the notification sound never comes, then for a brief moment you must confront the horrifying possibility that nobody cared. Generations from now archaeologists will discover your comment fossilized in the digital ruins of this app and ask each other, “What ancient catastrophe caused this individual to believe this was worth posting?” Entire documentaries will be made. Experts will debate. Historians will argue. Yet no answer will ever be found. The wildest part is that somewhere in your brain there was a process. Thoughts were generated. Decisions were made. Neurons fired. Electrical signals traveled at incredible speeds across a biological supercomputer evolved over millions of years just to arrive at THAT. That’s like using a space shuttle to deliver a single grain of rice across the street. I don’t even dislike the comment. I’m fascinated by it. It has the same energy as finding a shopping cart in the middle of a forest. You’re not angry. You’re not confused. You’re just left standing there wondering how events unfolded in such a specific sequence that reality allowed this to happen. Anyway I hope you have a good day. You clearly need all the victories you can get.