Soo here's my LGBTQ+ journey... as if 2026 June anyway- knowing me I'll probably start questioning again soon ToT I'm a very confused individual... (might update if I do) I left out all my ace questioning btw just in case .,. I forgor how old I was during most of my questioning bc my brain exploded, and I'm homeschooled and my mom didn't really teach me what grades were so idk what grade I was in either soo ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Cardinal is my friend @tomatoes_are_fruits follow it please!! :D Shout-out to her for helping me have an identity crisis XD Song: Born This Way by Lady Gaga If you're wondering what any of these labels mean, feel free to ask! ^^ I'm pretty sure that I'm genderqueer and not cis anymore, I thought I was somewhat genderfluid before I started feeling genderless and meh for like weeks and now I think agender fits, however I feel like my gender identity is not important which also makes me gender apathetic! (Apagender/cassgender??) Basically I probably wouldn't ever bring up the fact that I'm not cis, unless asked. And DEF not irl, unless possibly with really close friends. I feel genderless but I don't care if I'm viewed as just a girl my whole life (Tho some days I wish I could be seen as androgynous at least) I like all gendered and genderless language and terms! I decided to call myself both agender and genderqueer! Lesbian is my main identity cuz it's the one I'm most confident in, and it feels the most important to me ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Here are some signs that I was GAY when I was younger- or heck even recently cuz I no think :D (It's even more yapping...)
I was always kinda supportive of the LGBTQ+ community even without really knowing it existed, cuz my parents never taught me about it. When I watched Steven Universe and yk Ruby and Sapphire, it didn't really click in my head that they were both girls I was just like: Oh they love eachother! But even after getting exposed to a literal gay wedding, it still didn't really click, if anything I thought girls liking girls was just a fictional thing and it wasn't real. But then when I actually figured out all the terms and what it meant I made all my ocs lesbian bc I liked making girl ocs and I love shipping, and shipping two pretty girls together was like WHAT I can do that?? ToT Speaking of the whole pretty girl thing, I loveeed drawing female anatomy, and then staring at it L_L admiring my drawing and well the girl... hmm... and it wasn't just drawings, either. Whenever I would go out, I always found myself admiring the women around me, and since I was less socially anxious back when I was a kid, I would actually compliment them! I would be like "I really love your earrings" "Your dress is so pretty" and I always chucked it up to me just liking their pretty outfits and that's it... and I didn't know if it was attraction or admiration for SOOO long until one day (kinda recently when I was 16) I was looking at a girl and she looked back at me and smiled at me and I LOST it bro aaaaaaa that was lowk my first ever gay panic and that really sold it for me that I really did like girls :,) Back when I was a wee child, I did the Barbie thing yeah ToT I made the dolls smooch annnd other stuff- I had unlimited internet access when I was little and so stumbled upon things that I should've have seen... which really messed me up bc I was like 8 bro :,) also when I did know what LGBTQ+ was I did plushy RPs mostly with my sibling and we did have a few lesbian plushies lolzz Rouge was my lesbian awakening before I realized that it was a lesbian awakening L_L I was obsessed with drawing her, I would doodle her all the time, I loved her voice, I thought she was so pretty and I even asked to get a plush of her ToT I can like a character and not be attracted to them ofc but idk if this was hetero bro- cough I was always a hopeless romantic and I reallyyy want a partner, yet whenever my mom made comments like "your future husband" "boys like petite girls" "a man will protect you" it always made me feel uncomfortable, despite the fact that I would daydream about getting a boyfriend. Or maybe it's bc of the fact I don't really like being seen as something small and weak I hate that I'm so short ToT And when I finally accepted that I liked girls, I would always imagine a girl partner and not a boy, like ever. It was ALWAYS girls ToT yet I still called myself bisexual, I think I was mostly just in denial cuz I knew my parents were homophobic and I was hoping that in the future I could only have boyfriends and they wouldn't know I also liked girls... Yeahh now I can't get with anyone SOB When it came to literally any game where I could pick a lover and if I could I would most always pick a girl, my excuse being that none of the boys were my type, bc I only liked boys with long or fluffy hair xd that or I would make myself an oc instead, bc I can't like girls but my ocs can :D When I was young I always had male fictional crushes, but when i started calling myself lesbian suddenly all my fictional crushes are now girls? Then again all my "crushes" back then were just characters I thought looked cool or wanted to like comfort ToT One time I kept getting vids of VTubers debuts I would just stare at them bc pretty and one time there was this one tuber who had a deep feminine voice and I would just keep replaying the debut bc I just reallyyy liked her voice... L_L Actually speaking of which when I was young I thought that literally ALL feminine voices were pretty :^ Rouge was my first female crush, Rosalina was my second, both I had a fascination with yet didn't realize that it could be a crush .,.
