Neven had never felt this way before. No, who was he kidding, of course he had. Just not in the way he was feeling it now. He had been frustrated, annoyed, and ticked off before. He had felt bad for people if they got hurt or were having trouble. He had even (and though regretted this now) made fun of people behind their backs about things they couldn't really control. He was doing and feeling all that now. But not for or at other people. At him/self/. He felt furious with himself - with his tama - for being so weak. Not only was he unable to use his it more than once without getting tired, but trying to use it again had literally blown up in his face - exactly why he was now laid up in the infirmary with an injured arm and a grade two concussion. He felt bad for himself as well. Maybe that was selfish, but who wouldn't feel that way? His own tama had basically turned on him! Wait no, he wouldn't be saying that. That sounded pathetic. And though he was really beginning to think he was, he couldn't let other people see that. /Feeling weak/. He had always been really arrogant about his skills, but he wasn't exactly wrong, right? He was extremely skilled, and his tama was powerful. But being in the infirmary was forcing him to think. Think about whether everything he ever said about his own skill was anything but bragging. He had never doubted himself before, and he didn't like doubting himself now. But no matter how much he tried to think about something else, his thoughts always strayed back to one thing. // Am I really as good as I thought I was? //
