My sister kept BEGGING me to update my persona so here it is I tried to make it look as much like me as possible (except the eyes lol) i just can't draw eyes good :( It was all on kleki The song is Faint by linkin park (its looped) VENT: Just ignore it | | | --> I hate being me. Everyday i look at myself and hate the way i look, the way i talk to feminine, they hate they way i style my hair, the way i dress, and who i really am. “You are a girl act like it,” “trans people aren't trans they are just mental” “don't associate yourself with guys you aren't one of them” I cant tell anyone who i am only my siblings know. My bother thinks I'm faking it and that hurts knowing that. Its harder when some “know” and continue to rip you apart, to make degrading comments, or to them compliments that make me want to rip of my skin. I don't even know what to do when i found out i was gay i went through h3ll when my certain person found out she told me i didn't know and cant focus on it, she told me im not that and called me many names, but when i figured out i was trans and identified with it life got so much harder for me. None of this is easy. Idk if this will even get close to that but each day makes me question if i want to really live here in this life. I cant even tell my dad because we have a good relationship and I'm scared to ruin it by telling him. I don't know where he stands with trans idk where he would stand with me and this just adds on to the mess i call my life. I get nightmares everyday with the same messages every single day, same message, same ending, same feelings when i wake up i don't want to sleep knowing that I'll wake in another nightmare. I look at myself everyday and feel so much dysphoria in the way i dress. I guess you can say i wear two binders just to flatten my chest out and when i feel comfortable that's when everyone else gets to tear me apart. Its getting bad to where i can't use restrooms anymore without feeling wrong like i wanna cry. To everyone I'm a sister, daughter, niece, granddaughter, princess and i can do nothing but just smile through it and i feel so depressed knowing i might not ever be able to change that because to them I'm not a boy I'm a girl and i hate it. It feels even harder when i try to hide but continue to get dragged out of all my safe spaces. Sry to those who read this i just needed to let this out
