Im not even gonna joke about this anymore. My family is struggling. Now, Ik we always have our grandparents money wise but that's not all we're struggling with. Medication, therapy, food, electricity, car work, music lessons, privileges. Its all there. We're so low on money in this economy that we only eat food out of the fridge. My mama and I went grocery shopping and it was 72-79 dollars and I felt so bad. Then we had to get gas and all I could say was I'm sorry. And my mom said thank you. LIKE WTH? My sister's gen a brat too. Spending all day on her phone, she threw a fit about not having gum WHILE I WAS MAKING COOKIES. Like youre so greedy. We're struggling and youre talking about how you need gum. And then I have one glass in my room, talking bout "Bring your glass downstairs we're low!" Your room is so messy I cant see the floor. You have all the freaking glasses twin. And school for me is so stressful. I got a 0. (I fixed it) But I came home bawling my eyes out and begging for forgiveness. All I got was "Im dissapointed" And its fair. I have all the tools, if I had only walked to school earlier instead of wasting my time on this stupid computer and gotten help with math. From a teacher who told me she would help me with math even before school started. F-ing great job. And my parents are so stressed. My mama had been trying to get a job because we live off my dad's salary but 4 ppl quit with the team he works on so he's never home, always all over the country working. And it shows in my mom who has deppression, anxiety, health problems, athsma and insomnia. I feel so bad. Like all I can do is offer comfort. And my sister throwing fits isn't making it better. Like I zoned out when we were thrifiting for my halloween costume and she said "-------, wake up." Like im so sorry :(( Shes usually so nice.. its sucks. She's been getting very little sleep, and she has such a toxic workplace its so bad.. she gets yelled at by parents everyday and makes less than minimum wage. And my dad says 'She's making peanuts'. Which is true. And that sucks. She does so much for this family. The other day my dad cursed infront of me and Finn because my mama wasted time all day and now we were late to meet up with my grandparents because she had to get medicine from the pharmacy (the medicine wasnt even ready for pickup) And I had to remind my dad that me and my little sister are children, not people to curse at about my mom. You're our parents. Please don't fight. They even quit marriage therapy. 1, cause it didnt work 2, money. 3, my dads like never home anyway. I actually suffer daily and all I can do for my family is put on a smile and try not to get yelled at. I hate trump and his silly govement bringing my family down. I can't have nice things anymore. Today I noticed something funny. I was hungry. Like my stomach ached hungry. And we just left the grocery store. And I realized I only ate breakfast. Ive been eating less so the family has more. Im not doing well. I walk to school every day. I can't do anything about it. Every second. All I can think about is the money. Cause that's the only thing I can worry about and help fix. Im so tired of this. I wish it were better. I can't keep putting up with this.
