|TW: Mentions of bl00d, fighting, and d3@th. You have been warned.| ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ ❝ I'm drowning And it's easy to tell Because of the rushing water That sounds in my ears. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ It's not real But it feels real ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I wish I could deny it And make it go away Telling other cats that it's fake But it's not. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm afraid And I wish I wasn't. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Everyone always taught me That fear is a sign of weakness But doesn't everyone feel it? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Or am I the only one Who feels like I'm drowning Even though I'm not? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I can't show weakness Even if that weakness is fear Because fear is what makes a cat weak. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Fear makes a cat freeze It makes a cat fight And it makes a cat run. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Maybe it's fear that's dangerous Because it can make a cat fight Like they have everything to lose. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I don't have everything to lose anymore But I don't have nothing to lose, either. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I have Solitudepaw to lose And Hydrangeapetal And Fogbringer And my purpose. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I've lost so much Though Despite everything I miss that. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I've lost Bonekit And Morelkit And Nimbusnightmare And Fatefracture. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I've lost so much That I don't have everything to lose If I ever did. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I can't help but wonder If they are watching from above Or in Fatefracture's case From the territories unclaimed. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I've done so much wrong That my pain is my only feeling. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I've k!lled cats Fought more times than I can count And stolen and trespassed and lied. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm a burden And a curse For others to be around. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Sometimes I wake up And see red on my claws For the bl00d of the cats That I've k!lled. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ If they are watching me from above Then I'm not gonna say I'm sorry Because I'm not And I can't guarantee I ever will be ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Sailfishslaughter Cindersonnet Quollskip Are all the cats that have d!3d. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I didn't k!ll Quoll But I fought xem And Fogbringer sought vengeance For my loss. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I k!lled Cindersonnet Through an injury that refused to heal And she d!3d in pain Despite her innocence. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I k!lled Sailfishslaughter And I feel no remorse Even though I should. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Their bl00d stains my claws And no matter how hard I try It never seems to wash off. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I thought I was the hero But maybe all I ever was was the villain. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Now I don't know who I am And I'm not sure I ever did Throughout all of my life. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I thought I was Trufflekit Loud, reckless, bold And eager to prove I was best. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I thought I was Trufflepaw The apprentice who was ambitious Arrogant and still bold. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I never thought I was Trufflehunt Mostly because the name never fit me And my mother tried to call me that. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm not sure if I'm Truffletrouble anymore Or if I'm a nobody Who wastes the Clan's food. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I want to say sorry And apologize For all of the pain I've caused But I don't. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ It wouldn't be right If I were to Because murd3r3rs don't apologize. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ So neither will I Because I am one No matter how much I wish I wasn't. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I don't know How much further I have to fall Before I lose my mind. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Maybe I already have And I just haven't noticed yet. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Where are you, Nimbusnightmare When I need you the most? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm drowning And the one cat who could've saved me Has lost her own life. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Maybe this is how it's meant to be With me losing my mind. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Squirrelstar is wrong And she always was. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I was a fox-heart To ever think that she was right. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Is it my fault Fatefracture was exiled Because I told Squirrelstar about her? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Am I going to be the reason For the suffering of those I love? ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Everyone I speak to Eventually suffers And I feel like it's my fault. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Maybe I'm destined to be alone Destined to push those I care about away So they don't suffer At least not like I have. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Sometimes, I just wonder What it would be like here If I'd never hurt anyone. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ If I'd never k!lled anyone And watched them take their last breaths Right in front of me Like I did with Sailfishslaughter. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm a murd3r3r A criminal And a liar. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ Before, I didn't think I deserved a place in UrchinClan But now, I know I do And I'm not sure I want it Not if it means k!lling others. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm not Truffletrouble If I ever was. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm a drowning nobody And no one is coming to save me. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹
cont)) Maybe that's what I'll always be No matter what. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I wish that someone could save me That someone would save me But nobody can And nobody will. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ I'm learning one thing, if anything And that is that it's better to embrace it Then to push it away. ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ So that's exactly what I'll do No matter what. ❞ ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊୨ᰔ୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹ ERP, this took a while and a lot of effort!
