Friend rant...

Instructions

Hehe so this happened like a long time ago so everything is mostly okay rn, I just randomly decided to write about this. I got the idea to write about this from @kaypaws , go check out their projects. This whole story is true, but I will be using fake names for privacy, so... Lays (Mee) Elsie (old friend) Bella ( one of Elsie's friends) Mads ( another one of Elsie's friends) Paya ( Elsie's friends AGAIN HOLY vro ) Harp (person) This will be a rant and this whole story lasted for like 2 years so get ready to read a lot ig I'm not going to say the exact grade I was in when this started, but safe to say it was pretty early school-wise. A year before everything started going wrong, me and Elsie would talk a little bit, mostly just in art class bc we were seated next to each other. One year later, we had more classes with each other, so we started talking even more. We were pretty close back then, we had our own small friend group with me, Elsie, paya, and some other friends that aren't listed above. We would talk everyday at lunch and then hang out at recess afterwards by the benches. (Having recess nowadays seems like a luxury but idk) The year after that was a little different though, bc that was the year when Mads joined our school. Elsie and mads started talking a lot. Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with Elsie having other friends, but they were talking so much that they were basically just leaving me out. It sort of discouraged me, so I started talking less, and making less of an effort to try and strike up a conversation, because why try when all they're going to do is say " um, ok" and then ignore me again? I vividly remember one week Paya went on a vacation to Florida, and she brought back these cute little turtles made out of yarn. She got three of them. One for her, one for Elsie, and one for Mads. She didn't even look at me, even though I was right there when she was giving them out. I was so confused and disappointed.One time, Elsie DID actually notice this, and said "Don't you think that Lay's is acting quieter?" I got quiet because I didn't know how to respond, ( how would you respond to that? ) and they eventually just shifted the conversation topic. The whole rest of that year, I taught myself that whenever I was being left out, just try harder and harder to talk to her and do whatever I could to be included. This did work for a while, I was at least addressed in the friend group a little bit, but it was horrible to my mental health. [ AHEM. FAST FORWARD ANOTHER YEAR. ] We only had one class with each other, but we started talking a lot again. We were able to choose our seating chart, so we sat next to each other. I was beginning to think that maybe I was just being dramatic, and that Elsie would never leave me out. We had each other's numbers outside of school, so we would hang out and sometimes even have sleepovers with some of our other friends. But then in class she just started talking to me less again. She would start talking to other people, (and again I was fine that she had other friends) but it was getting to the point where she would physically MOVE HER STUFF after the teacher would take attendance to sit by her other friends, without even telling me or inviting me to come with. I would be fine if this happened once or twice, but it happened everyday. Because of this, I was under the assumption that we had drifted apart and that she js didn't want to be friends anymore, so I stopped talking to her as much. I was hosting a party and I was initially going to invite some of my other friends excluding Elsie. One of the people that I invited was Harp. At the time, harp didn't know about what happened between me and Elsie, and she was also pretty close with her, so apparently harp just started talking about how excited she was for my party or whatever, and Elsie said that she hadn't known abt it or smth. That same day, I waited by harps locker as usual so we could talk after school, and she saw me and slammed her locker shut. She was clearly angry, and I she was shoving her stuff around in her locker, she asked "did you not invite Elsie?" I could actually feel my heart start beating faster because I hadn't met for her to get so angry, but at the moment I couldn't think of anything to say, so I answered honestly and I said " no, I didn't. " I quickly followed up with, " I'm not angry or anything". Harp wasn't having it though, and she just quickly walked past me without giving me time to explain or apologize. I ran after her and I found her and Elsie outside of the school. I was pressured into inviting Elsie, but at the time I genuinely felt guilty and I thought that it was all my fault. I apologized, promised I would text her after school, and said that I would invite her. I sent her a long text saying things like, "I'm rlly srry" and "I thought we had drifted apart" ( Scroll down, desc was too long. ↓↓ )