Click the space bar to see the poem. Read what is below if you wish. This poem and the song that accompanies it relate to one of the darkest parts of my life, when I thought I had a friend, but turned out to be a scandalous child predator. Before I knew him for what he truly was, I loved him like a brother, and maybe more. From what he told me, we were just so similar. We liked the same music, we liked the same video games, we even shared some of the troubles in our past. I wish I could just leave all of this behind, but my mind is scarred, and I cannot ever forget how this happened. When he and I were friends, I had thought that he was what was keeping me afloat in the churning sea of madness around me, when in fact, he was what was dragging me under the waves of turmoil. It is hard for me to trust those I meet, in reality and virtually. It is easier for me to sympathize with artists like Anna Graceman, Set it Off, Maroon 5, The Script, Kelly Clarkson, and Colbie Caillat. When I fell for his ruse, I fell hard, and I still suffer from it to this date. I managed to get away on a cold night in February, when everything I thought I knew about him shattered. Before, I thought he lived in Gilbert, Arizona, but that night, he sent me a text, not with one of the two numbers he used, but with one that was traced back to a Chinese restaurant in my home town. It was then that I put two and two together and revealed the truth. I called my mother, and she in turn called the police. All of the numbers associated with him were blocked, and my mother changed my phone number. That cold night in February, filled with fear and remorse, I lied in my bed, crying my eyes out, asking myself, "Why did this happen to me. How could I have trusted that monster?" I cried in my sleep, awoke in the morning, and cried even more. He and I met on a site for a fandom in early July of 2016, and those six months in which I thought I knew him were the worst six months of my life. If it were not for him, my heart and soul would not have been halved, one side wanting to warn others to not make the same mistake, and the other to keep all my pain trapped inside me. I'm not asking for your pity, I am just asking that you understand what I have been through, and the purpose of this poem. I want you all to have a window into another person's life, to bear their pain with them, celebrate their victories with them, cry with them in their sadness, to laugh with them in their glee, and to mourn with them in times of grief and heartbreak. This is the lament of the six months of nightmarish Hell that I went through to be here today. I hope you understand what I mean by writing this poem, and why I link it with my not-so-distant past, and this song that was what roused me from my misery. Melpomene, the muse of tragedy, is the muse that is closest to me. I am inspired by my pain, which is released in the form of words and sentences, rhyme and rhythm. I hope that this window into my mind helps you to better understand my struggles, and why I am who I am today.
Credit to my past for the inspiration, to Anna Graceman for the music, and to you for reading this and supporting me.
