ya think i'm depressed? well how'd ya guess? why does my mind act like this? well i'm tryna find what went amiss. why am i so avoidant? just get up already. why do i hate it when i care? well it's cuz it's not done. why can't i get it done? 'cause you don't care. why do i hate the Unfinished? well, it's for their fulfillment. who is it for? well, you know. why do i do it then? well, logos y information why? they tell us to... why do i do it all wrong? haha, just get up already. why do i care if i'm right? well, we've always been uptight. what's keeping me from my dream? weights made of fear, it seems. why do i love? love can change the world. why am i-- well then, ya filthy teen. why do i have this feeling of dread? just get up already. why can't i move? well, feaar of faulire and flying the coup. why are we split in two? just get up already. can i love her? just get up already. i can start with chem homework... just get up already. ya think i'm unmotivated? well, life's been played eh?
The first drawing was apparently made July 20 2019. So, awhile back. It took about an hour 45 to modify it, mostly spent on the 2nd drawing, the poem, and the music. I had to listen to my feel-good song to make sure it worked in project and i feel better already! :) just wish that I could stay that way... :/ CONTEXT: had these feelings for awhile and quarentine is so not helping. using escapism in my imagination like way back when and listening to anime music is what's making me able to go on. i don't mean that in a heavy way, but in a way where i feel powerless (and ik better but things like this aren't easily changed), like i do everything wrong, and i am unmotivated toward things i need to do. then i beat myself up over it, crippling myself further, so yea. i'm just schoolwork adverse (symptom of a larger unidentified issue) to the extent where it isn't a joke and i need help but literally noone's there so it's fine
