scratch history: i created @wurly7 in 2015(?) and made two bad projects; you can still view them if you look up wurly7. then i made @egordon6 and made one bad project (my brother made the other one). my first good account was @swoopsoar1, where i hit over 50 followers and over 1,000 views when i was active there. during that period i tried to make kacey: the movie and failed. i met my first scratch friend @dawson2015. my irl friend @cattoy joined. life was good. there actually was no scratch drama in the community. (at least for me) i made @swoopsoar2 as a side account, where i wanted to feature my new series procinia. that failed, and all that's left of that account is a cringy intro and a trailer. i made @-skiv-, an account centered around skiv alclove (now skiv adiere) from my novel. on this account i started falcon woods, a strict roleplay that got decently far. lots of people seemed to enjoy it. (fewer than ten, okay? i had low standards) after i had the brilliant idea for my bird to program by pecking areas of the screen and walking across the keyboard. thus @thecutepiper17 was born. not the bird; the account. sometime around this period i decided to rebrand around my new animated series falcons. all non-falcons projects were unshared. i could animate in vector and made some candling awful platformers. scratch 3.0 was coming, and with it, drama. i tried to animate a walk cycle in the beta of 3.0, failed, and made the hard decision to leave scratch. i would use adobe animate instead. did i leave? you guessed it: no. i braved the disgustingly large blocks of 3.0 for no reason other than fame, i guess. i shared falcons part 1, people liked it, and i liked the fame. my voice was cringy, and i remember inhaling helium and recording my lines in this very room that i'm typing in. i decided that my pen name swoop soar was cringy, so i wanted to change it. you can guess how i changed it. i changed it to kara korussi. () the forgotten legacy was the main focus of my new account, and i even shared a cringy vector animated map part with arran, wiggs, and skiv. soon i decided to make the forgotten legacy an animated series on scratch as well. i picked the first people who auditioned, as always, and i later regretted it. i couldn't animate too well, but i did manage to crank out the forgotten legacy part 1 before stopping the animated series (not the novel) entirely. it's cringe now, but i did love how i opened with strawberry avalanche by owl city. speaking of owl city, i watched the guardians of ga'hoole movie (not as good as the books but still decent) and heard the song take to the sky. i wanted to make an map for that. things were going great. very few people joined, and the map was left stagnant for about a year before i finally quit it. indigo lost, the corvid island roleplay, thrived around this time. it was thrilling to see so many wonderful people roleplay their birds, and when i saw the comment number soar past 1000 i was amazed. it got to be the top search result for "roleplay". for some reason i got interested in the furry fandom in late 2019. i asked a couple questions, including if there were birds in the fandom, and decided to join. this really changed my life, and even if my first fursona was bad and rarely used, i loved her for a while. around this time i met and started becoming interested in digital art on krita. my second art dump was curated, and i was fame obsessed. for a while i tried to mimic cathi in her style before branching off into a new one. i made my side account for bad projects. i could goof around on here, although i rarely did for a long time. it's only recently that i can make "haha war in ba sing se go whoosh" jokes on here. then... the dark ages happened. some people were being awful in a Christian studio, i told them to stop, and they harassed me. i had my first anxiety attack because of them right in this room, and it still makes my heart race just thinking about it. i tried to look for people on my side, but nobody sided with me. in desperation i turned to . i vented on there until it was safe to return. i got banned for protesting against a project that had to do with covid (it was calling it "just a flu", okay?), something else, and being my real name. for the days i had to leave i was devastated; i had become obsessed with scratch to the point where i just had to go onto until i was unbanned.
i got into something that i thought was good, i thought it was me, but it was actually an awful lie. i said some things about myself that weren't true, associated with some users who did the same things, and it wasn't until around july that i understood what i had done. i still struggle with this, mainly in the form of me wondering how i should treat people who do those things. i'm an all-or-nothing person. either i join them or i openly harass them. i'm hoping to talk to others who have experienced a similar thing. recently i was rejected from animationclan, and i did something horrible in response. it felt good in the moment but boy do i regret it now. i started becoming more active on nanowrimo and i loved the people there. they were such an open group, and it was so different from scratch. i haven't made any projects since my rejection because of this. i joined toyhouse, and knew that i was growing out of scratch. being on a real art site is so much better than this dump of a kid's site. recently, after not really doing much, i looked back on the community, and you know what i saw? a bunch of immature kids hurting each other, calling them awful names i'd never repeat to anyone, having fights among friends. i've grown, and while i'm not leaving for the foreseeable future because i'm still addicted to fame on this site, i won't interact too much with some of the younger users (under 10-year-olds) and the more toxic ones. i've learned a lot, and while i wish some things didn't happen, i've learned from them too.
