song is by twenty one pilots
this is the first animatic i made in a long long time, wowee. uhh i couldnt finish it cuz i lost motivation like with all my vents so hhhhh the original desc: "its ok. its karma. i deserve it. before i started scratch i was a homophobe. "ew, two men holding hands? ugh, i don't hate that but it's just wrong." i was toxic. i was very very clingy to the few friends i had. i'm sorry. i thought emos and genuinely sad depressed people were the same. "they're dramatic. stop faking," for trying to cope in a healthy way. i'm.. really.. sorry. i was a hypocrite. there's no excuse. ..i think 2020 made me learn my lesson. it was the first time in a few years i felt wrong in my body and my pronouns. it would fluctuate, but it was always there. after a ton of experimenting (which might not be completely finished yet don't judge) i realized i'm neutrois and omni. heavy, especially when everywhere you look you're told that's wrong and that it's looked down upon. especially when you're told that your sister's old teacher became a conversion therapist. especially when your friends always say crap like "lol xd thats so g4y" and "ew ngl that's g4y", and use gay and trans as a swear. and especially, ESPECIALLY when you overthink all the goddamn time. don't get me started on overthinking. just don't; the stuff i overthought about is.. not appropriate for scratch. all you need to know is that it was torture. it gave me headaches and crap and i had no way to cope.. i tried to "punish" myself out of it by biting my arms, but, naturally it fueled that fire. i haven't gotten out of it yet. i've been biting daily. the bruises are hard to hide. and no one cared. almost; my brother found out and tried to stop me. but i couldn't.. i'm sorry." as you can see i ain't doing great, and there's a bit more i wanna talk about, buuuut this desc legit took like a week to write and i wanna banish this entire thing out of existence in the past, present, and future cuz its one of the things i wanted to talk bout but didn't. aighty imma go play apollo justice bye ok this is the end of the desc for the ppl who wanted to finish reading to feel good bout themselves. go up and read it. all of it.
