eyes brown soft and romantic, why does it feel so damn addicting. looking at the pictures of you and i wonder how did i get here. body dysmorphia, it swallows me whole, everyday that im here. prodding and poking i just can't seem to be able to see past this little flaw in me. I'd like to let this fade away, can i just jump from here. i can watch as the world will disappear from my hands or i can jump after those who have hurt me. The arrow from my own slips into their hearts making them drop to the floor in pain. this is my psychopathic destiny. Feeling lost is strange. My sense of what’s right and wrong has been left me feeling dizzy. I just wish to be home again. falling into insanity sitting up all night blasting music through my phone. The moon shining down on me reminding me of them. Tell me when it’s over I’ll be sleeping right here almost dead. crying in my sheets, my head hung low. i wish i could just end it all here, but I'm living for a purpose. every breath i take i wish it would be my last. The river that is my future has suddenly taken a sharp turn. I watch as the bodies drop to the floor smiling. I swing my bat over my shoulder the blood from their heads splattered all over me. I grin and wipe the blood from my face only smudging it. you sit in solitary waiting for an escape. You shake crying you haven't stopped crying since you got there. in the distance, you hear voices and scream out your lungs feel like they're collapsing. You're crying fades as the hope for someone to find your rises. The people find you and open the door but they're not people. Just the same black shadows with creepy white smiles and piercing white eyes that brought you here.
daunting eyes, now i can see it. thought you could trick me i guess that you did. overwhelmed and i cant help but i hope that you're doing well. scrolling through social media. no matter how bad these platforms make me feel I always come back. wanting to die to be a model like them or even sell my soul. I look down at myself noticing a glimmering knife on the counter. i cry day in day out. i cant seem to get over you. the overwhelming feeling just pushes on me until i break like an eggshell. The blood on my cheek as i stroke your cheek. "now, ill always be the pretty one." My grin is wide as i get up and walk away. Eyes violet, mentally scarred. drop to the floor and my eyes are bleeding. sinking low in the depths of depression how did i get here. I love you, from the depths of my heart, each breath i take i take for you. My darling, my little angel please don't leave me. My purpose is to serve you, to serve us, my angel, why did you fly away, may i join you? may i too grow my wings and fly through the opening in the sky. Please wait for me little angel, give me time and i will find you again.
