hi. i know that this is sudden, and i don't really know how to start on these kinds of projects, so here goes three days ago, my very close friend group had a fight. a fight that i, somehow, was the primary focus of let's backtrack a little to about a month ago. one of the friends, let's call them "m", sent a message concerning one of the people in our group. this person, let's call them "c", i was never really close to them. the message went along the lines of "sorry that i've been distant for quite a while. i've just felt ignored. i hope you all understand". now, this friend, "c", was a very extrovert-y person. they would chat a lot, send memes or whatever. let's take a look at the "distant" line. they are not distant. they never have been. "quite a while". just the day before that, they sent an edit they made. a few memes. so, as i assume anyone would do, i began to question. why did they feel ignored?? i searched up the art they'd sent the past few weeks. now, there are 6 of us in this group, including me. in every picture, edit, video they sent, there were at least 3 hearts. half of us. there were even compliments about their art. i was confused. why did they feel "ignored"? was it because not all of us hearted the image, video? now, all of us attend school. of course we would be busy. we obviously can't always be there to see the things people send. i started to think that "c" was asking for attention. it was just a thought, keep that in mind. few days after that, "c" came back. they seemed n o r m a l. as if nothing happened at all. as if worrying for them guaranteed them extra attention when they came back. i was very confused. and, a little annoyed. so, i muted the chat for a while. when i came back, "c" left again. wow, "c". just because **one** person didn't see your messages, you decide to leave?? i was led to believe that they were baiting us. and who wouldn't have thought of that? something was wrong. i discussed the situation with my group. ex. "why do you guys think "c" left?" or "do any of you know what happened to them?" perfectly normal questions. then, "m", the one i mentioned earlier, and "s", another friend, began defending "c". note that they are close friends of "c" i??? was just asking questions?? long story short because i don't want to prolong this project, that became a fight. i got so fed up by their accusations that i just went ahead and said my opinions. that blew them up. i know i shouldn't have said that, that "c" was "baiting" us and asking for attention. i know. but it seemed so wrong. fast forward a day later. the fight had died down, i shut up for the sake of the group. "c" was added back and we were being normal, ignoring the elephant in the room. i still continued discussing "c"'s behavior though, with two of my close friends in that group. let's call them "miyuu" and "rin" (i'm using their oc names because as good friends they deserve that kind of recognition). we all agreed that something was going on. (c) ↴
(c) take note that in the period between last month's fight and the fight three days ago, "m" and "s" downright treated me like i had the personality of an expired egg. i mean, ok, sure ig, but at least be subtle about it it??? they ignored my messages, left me on read, talked over me, etc, EXACTLY was being ignored is like. you hear that "c"??? THAT is what being ignored is. now, back to three days ago. out of nowhere, "c" sent a whole, 3 paragraph-long, GOODBYE letter (viewer discretion advised, included some very sappy stuff that is probably fake) hhahha OF COURSE we were in chaos after that. exactly 20 minutes after "c" decided to press send, both "s" and "m" left. "s", claimed, that they didn't "act" as a better friend to "c". miyuu, rin and i were ranting about "c"'s actions after that. we even tried contacting them, but what do you know, they BLOCKED us. rin, the responsible smart friend, decided to add "m" back ("s" blocked all of us lol). "m" explained that they left because someone was being toxic and that they wanted to get away. it was my pleasure to be the "toxic" one in that situation, even though that the identity was left unsaid. we ALL knew, "m". we added "s" back eventually, because we needed answers. then came a series of what i would like to call war messages. and let me tell you, when "m" and "s" did not listen, THEY DID NOT LISTEN. said things like "aw look they're actually trying to say something *insert cute (mocking) face here*" to IGNORE US. eventually, rin stopped reading the messages (im sorry rin). and in a desperate move, "m" and "s" started BLACKMAILING ME. hear me out, "s" was one of my closest friends BEFORE. "m" was, kind of?? but no, not really. when we first became a group, miyuu and i weren't really close. they were a jokester and liked teasing people. i, vulnerable 10-year old me, thought that they were actually bullying me with the JOKES. so i told "s" about it, and called miyuu "heartless" out of emotion. and if things couldn't get worse in the present, THAT was what "s" decided to send. now miyuu, heard of it, but not the heartless part. and it was then that they stopped reading the messages. THEN "s" and "m" started blaming me for that, which i guess was the only sensible thing they did in the fight. they started degrading me after that. calling me names, yknow insults... i left, which i know would've made me look weak then, but it was too much. my face was literally so sticky from the tears that i could peel the dry stuff off like dried glue (haha i dont know if this is supposed to be a storytime or a vent actually) anyways we got frappe afterwards in a starbucks drive thru so i guess that was what i coped with. i should've known that that would happen, anyways. it always did. to me, at least. got replaced a few years ago, drifted away from another group in the next. um thank you ! for coming to this dumb storytime.. please don't worry about me. i'm getting better, i promise. looking back at it now it was rather silly to be honest.... i don't know if it was really me that started the fight, or them. anyways, thank you, again, and have a great/day/night/evening ^^ sometimes, because of situations like these, i start to doubt myself. should i not say anything at all? does having friends meaning that eventually i'll hurt them? ... the silence after rain. how quickly the sky puts herself together.
