hey, it's me. i've been thinking of leaving this website, maybe others too, for a while. it's draining knowing that people are hurt and scared because of me and i dont want anyone to feel down because of me anymore. it's not like me to say this, but everyone is pretty much better off without me. i vent too much, i talk too much, and all that plus separation anxiety sucks. i'm being suffocating. idk how to stop myself. since the start of this school year, i've been worse. mentally and physically. my mental health is crumbling down, and i'm in more and more pain in my leg, back, neck, chest, etc. i havent been drinking much water, sometimes going a day without drinking anything just to feel absolutely terrible the next day, having a possibility of fainting in class. im looking at my body in a completely different way than last year. idk how to get healthier. it might be because ive lost/im losing friends, and some friends are away from school, the ones that really help me the most, because this virus. i wont be taking a break for now, but im contemplating it. i'll be getting the vaccine in the next few months, which is good, and i hope to see the two friends who really know me well irl in school next year. there's 4 weeks left of school. summer break, then seeing my frog-deer shirt-cheese ice (inside jokes lol) loving friends next year! as well as the people who make me who i am (ria, yoink, vul), thank you. you've changed me and helped me move on from my past self and taught me to love myself unconditionally. thank you. y'all can message me elsewhere. i have my social media on my bio, check there. <3 see you later, clowns
