hello ruffians and thieves it is now the year 2022 and i am here to share my resolutions for the new year i have 7 1. be more evil there just wasn’t enough wrongdoing for me personally in 2021. i need to amp it up a notch. be MORE selfish, MORE crafty, MORE villainous just for the sake of it 2. learn to read i tried picking up a book the other day and i couldn’t read it because there were no pictures. this year i will finally learn reading 3. have more audacity a lot of cishet men have been grinding my gears lately so i’m just going to start telling them to shut up more. i won’t name names but they are so loud and so confidently wrong all the time and i have never met a loud man that i trust. quiet ones are cool though 5. be more obsessed with myself i’ve noticed myself being insecure lately and low confidence is NOT cool. i am cool so i have to start being more obsessed with myself and my face. my nose is long like a bird nose. who cares?? i’m hot i have a hot girl nose. a strong nose. i’m not small. ok??? the only people who care about other women being small are loud incorrect men and women with internalized misogyny. who cares about them im a hot girl with a hot girl belly and i am obsessed with myself 6. be less annoying idk if this is contradicting 5 but omg i am so annoying and unfunny and all the jokes i tell at school are ur mom jokes and jokes similar to that. i need to be funnier because funny people are cool and i feel immature 7. hehehehehehehehehhehehee!!!!!!!!!!!!! that are all my resolutions - eiisl
