eheh, this is probably a late hiatus notice since I've been virtually dead for 2 weeks, but I'm going on a hiatus (again) I legit never feel good about myself, but rn it's to an extreme level. Like,,, if you look up "what are signs of inferiority complex" you can take every single one of those symptoms and say "That is basically Landon's entire personality rn lmao" Just like...everything hurts. But..I don't really feel pain at the same time, if you get what I mean. It's just one of those things were your entire existence feels like a waste and it HURTS, but you've also just kind of accepted it at this point.. I'm also really upset with myself because I'm just crazy paranoid and anxious, I can't walk properly, and I just feel stuck, academically, artistically, and mentally. It honestly makes me despise myself to the extent where I feel like I'm going to vomit. I also keep feeling like I'm a hindrance to the people around me,,, just today I felt like if I were to join in the conversation my friends were having I would just ruin the happy "we're leaving school!" mood and ended up staring at this freaking string that is tied to the ceiling in the cafeteria. Don't get me wrong, it's a string nothing is wrong with the string, string is incredible, I just feel like I'm a pathetic excuse for a homosapien, and honestly I've considered taking myself out of the societal equation multiple times because every time I look at the fruits of my artistic labor, or at the mirror, or my grades, anything, all I can think about is how I'm wasting precious oxygen that someone else who can actually benefit society could be using right now. You know, I wonder how I developed an inferiority complex. My parents are quite nice to me, and it's not like I was shoved into any closets or had my lunch money stolen. Was I just born like this? Or did my pathetic brain just take the fact that I didn't have very many friends too seriously? Just,,why am I like this, you know?
yeet I just cannot be serious can I lmao
