“You wanted to see me?” Nightshade said into the dark leader den, shaking out her fur as snow powdered her dark pelt. Hawkstar had asked for her as the meeting had died down and the sun had set allowing the stars to now shine from above. Snow falling down into the clearing behind her as the yellow eyes of her leader turned to look at her. As eyes adjusted she could make out more of the state of her old mentor. The fur on his back was on end and his eyes were tinted red from the tears that were just falling from his eyes moments before the she-cat even walked in. “Come sit with me Nightshade,” his voice was low as he spoke looking down at the stone ground next to his nest. Slowly and hesitantly she went over to stand next to the brown furred tom. “Is everything ok? I-I mean after the clan meeting and…” Nightshade’s heartbeat quickened, her tongue seeming to tie in knots in her mouth. “It wasn’t so bad right? I mean how could any of us know she was your-” “Nightshade I plan on leaving Thunderclan and giving up the title of leader.” The audible gasp that left her mouth was one that echoed off of the silent stone walls. “Leave?...Why?” Even if the warrior was just tripping over words and stuttering her voice was clear with confusion and drops of hurt littered her tone. Ears lowered as her eyes shined up at him waiting for him to confess his reason, explain why he is choosing to leave his life, his clan, behind. “I’m the leader of Thunderclan. I’m meant to guide, lead, and stand strong in moments of weakness and uncertainty. Yet look at the clan now, cats dying from fox attacks, sickness spreading, and I can’t seem to do anything to stop disputes between the cats I’m meant to be a leader for,” claws scrapped against the moss that was under them as his tail lashed in anger of the inner waves of self guilt that seemed to drown his thoughts. “You were my mentor Hawkstar,” Nightshade’s voice brought the tom to look at her, but her eyes were set looking up in deep thought. “You still are, even if I’m not an apprentice anymore you taught me how to hunt, battle, and learn the territory and its secrets. Even more than that, you taught me how to use my body and environment to better a situation and how to never underestimate myself or my oppinate. Hawkstar…you took me in when I was only a kit and allowed me to grow up here…you’re like a father to me when I didn’t have one,” Her voice was one of truth and thoughtfulness. “But Nightshade look at my real family. Vineripple is my daughter and I had to live with that lie the moment Deertuft started carrying kits and look at my real mate, Firewhisker, she hasn’t spoken to me since the meeting. What happened with Deertuft was a mistake from my youth and that litter was never meant to happen yet it did and now I have to live with the consequences. So that’s why I plan on leaving Thunderclan Nightshade, you’re the only one that knows only because I knew you would try to look for me the most, believe I would come back and I didn’t want you to continue carrying that confusion for moons after words. Nightshade, you and most of this clan didn’t do anything wrong and this is just the consequences to my own actions and I don’t think I can be leader after lying to so many of you,” Nightshade pressed deeply into his thick fur and she allowed her head to rest close to his chest. Hawkstar dropped his tail over her back as he gently licked her between the ears, “I will be leaving before sunrise. Please Nightshade don’t try and stop me.” “I won’t Hawkstar, I promise.” Just like that he was gone, the time she woke up the clan was in a blind panic as patrols were made to try and look for him. The freshly fallen snow in the clearing was trampled by the paws of rushing clanmates. The trails they found lead to deadends and soon they gave up on trying as they walked in circles and of course Nightshade kept her mouth closed as she went on hopeless patrols along borders and when she heard her clanmates ask other clan patrols if they’ve seen him. One even went along the monster path in fear that he was struck by one blindly when out that morning but nothing came up once more. The black she-cat didn’t even know where the leader planned on heading, she didn’t want to know just hoping that wherever he went he was safe and well off. Soon enough Stagleap, went onto high rock to announce that she will be taking the role of stand in leader until Hawkstar is found as she hasn’t earned her own nine lives and Lionheart, Thornpads former mentor, became the deputy for the time being. Yet that time being slowly turned into a moon then after another and soon the seasons once more began to change and the chillking cold of leafbare warmed up allowing the snow to melt and life to slowly start re-enter the clans.
