i hate that im making so many vents ughhhhhh i just need it- i dont have another therapist appointment for who knows how long [the following vent includes things such as homophobia and bullying, if you are uncomfortable with these topics, please click off, thanks <3 have a good day/night!] so- drama class- the other day they figured out i'm gay and now they find every reason to hate me and make fun of me- but basically yesterday (sep 22) they decided they were gonna make fun of me for having a panic attack- yes you read that right- they made fun of me for a freaking panic attack- legit i was sobbing as they continued yelling stupid stuff at me- the teacher heard everything and yet he said nothing- the whole reason i had a panic attack was because of them- i was supposed to go up in front of them and act out my skit that i didn't have the words fully memorized -i would have gotten made fun of anyhow, for my stutter-they made fun of me all day for it- what was i supposed to do, be in front of everyone and get made fun of, or sit in the corner and get made fun of-? i chose the corner- i feel sick to my stomach even thinking about going back into that class- its purely sickening all the things they said- no one cared. no one stood up for me. no one. my friends didn't even try. no one-! everyone heard the awful things they said- everyone. even the teacher said nothing. he let them make fun of me till i was shaking and crying so bad i couldn't stop- there was only one girl that came and said sry they were being so awful- it was nice- but then again, she also said nothing to them- i could barely move by the end of class- i felt ...gross- thats the word- i felt like garbage- my shoulders were heavy and all i wanted was to leave and never come back- i felt like i had a pit in my stomach- a pit with 45 pounds of pure bricks of awfulness inside- ive been bullied before, but i dont remember it being this bad- it was spread out- usually with a couple of days in between. but this has gone on for two days in a row and im already so disgusting feeling- like that feeling you get when you are in an airplane and it just drops-
