TW FOR BOTH : drjnkjng mention,, violence,, g0r3 ━━━━━━ ( Rowan ) ━━━━━━ The year is coming to an end, and honestly? It's been a breeze. I'm in 11th grade, I have a girlfriend, and everyday I walk into school with people staring in admiration. I've been with Christine for about a few years, and when we met, she promised me she'd made me the brightest future ever, the one I've always wanted. I have a small band, with me, myself, and I. Yeah, I play electric guitar in my garage during my free time - my mom couldn't handle it in the house anymore, but at least I get to do it either way. Everyone here knows about my skills, and with the amount of support I get from these kids, it boosts my confidence up majorly, and I know by this I can certainly make it as the most known rock star ever. I've had some, /bumps/, along the way of getting here. In elementary, a kid named Nyx Haruki moved into this school. Y'know him? Well, nobody did back then. Apparently he came from a very wealthy family, but pssh, I hardly believed it. He wore basic clothing, couldn't hand out money to kids who asked, and nobody even knows where he came from. He was probably homeless back then, I have no idea. At the time, I was more on the ''unpopular'' side, and I decided to befriend him. I'd like to say he was annoying, but to be real, he was pretty nice if you got to know him. He was pretty awkward, but he spoke up a lot at the time and tried to befriend anyone he saw. Everyone else sort of... laughed at him, but he hadn't noticed and just kept going. I... admired that. I remember when I was picked on everyday, and hell, you don't know how many fights I've been involved in for that. I was his only friend, so he looked up to me a lot, and it bugged me at some points - he didn't seem cultured at all, he'd just always be in my personal space and all that. Pretty dumb. We had been friends for a couple years, and once we made it to freshmen, I had joined band that year, deciding I should finally play in public. Of course, I was 10x more advanced than other kids, and I got noticed by this girl named Christine. I've had a class crush on her for a while, but never intending on trying to ask her out. Well, she came up to me, and boy was I freaking out. She wanted to give me advice for popularity, so I could get noticed around here, and it'd be the start of my future! I happily accepted, obviously, and she'd give me a lot of tips! Majority of those tips were towards my appearance... but hell, she'd know style better than me. I'd dress more 'punk' like, which got her very interested in me, dare I mention. She didn't seem to like my glasses, so I stopped wearing them. My eyesight was a bit blurry, but it's nothing I couldn't clear out. I told Nyx about her, and he seemed a bit - unsure. He told me he'd seen her leave a lot of other men crying, and a lot of girls questioning their self image. He made me think about it for a while, he was my friend... should I trust him? I'd vent to Christine about it, and she told a good point; Nyx hadn't been exposed to people /ever/, especially in a school - it's told he had been in a private school before his parents had died or something. She was right. What was he to tell me what and what not to do in this situation? Christine obviously wasn't lying to me, I would know. A few months passed, and Nyx seemed more distant from me ever since me and Christine well, started dating. I was much more confident in myself, but Nyx didn't seem to like me anymore. Why? Could he not accept who I wanted to me? Who I truly was? Or was he jealous? Thoughts ran through my head, giving me migraines throughout the day. After school one day, he came up to me without a smile - and that wasn't usual, at all. He wasn't smiling at me? I'm his only friend? He told me he wanted to be my friend, but he couldn't if she was around. Oh. I had gotten angry that night, and spent an all nighter calling Christine on the phone. She told me what to do. I obeyed. If Nyx wasn't going to be my friend anymore, he'd receive the same treatment that Christine would give to anyone /she/ wasn't friends with. I think he'd need that discipline, the introduction to what really happens in this generation. When the last bell rang, Nyx had gotten his bag from his locker. That was the time. I had tapped him on the shoulder, and asked him to talk in the bathrooms. We'd went towards the men restrooms, however, I shoved him into the empty classroom before there. It hadn't taken long, but we'd ... hurt him. It wasn't in the agreement, but I couldn't care less at the time. He made me mad. He had been sent to the hospital that night, and hadn't come back for a week. Then he did. With a blind eye and bruises nobody could see from that basic hoodie. Cops don't knows who contributed. They never will. I'll live with that guilt feeling that I ruined that boy so much. But I'll never say sorry. Nobody will know my weakness. ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
━━━━━━ ( Nyx ) ━━━━━━━ ( W/O stutters ) 11th grade is almost over... Is it disrespectful to be relieved? The learning isn't difficult... more the social institute of it. Private schools were much calmer... I see the differences now, definitely. I don't really have friends here... and the only person I'd talk to nowadays is the teachers /if/ they ever called on me. It wasn't like that before high school... I had a friend, his name was Rowan. When I moved with my adoptive parents.. I had to move from the only place I was familiar with. They weren't like my past family ... well, they were just like my brother, maybe Enkai would've liked these people... Sorry, off track hah... I tried to befriend some of the other kids, they looked really cool! They seemed to find humor in my ''hellos'' ... I think. However, Rowan was the one person who actually came up to me. I was pretty surprised, I think I gave an awkward impression, but he didn't mind it! Nobody usually comes up to /me/ but it was a great start. I looked up to him a lot... I hoped to be his best friend. I've always wanted one for myself. He seemed really insecure about himself, I wasn't sure how to help him... but I hoped one day he'd finally be able to express himself! There was this one day, where I was grabbing my history binder in the morning... when Rowan came up to me more excited then usual. He had a lot of more, 'goth' accessories on, which wasn't like him. Was that him finally gaining confidence? I had wondered, and it made me happy he was. Though, he'd told me that it was the girl named Christine who had given him the courage. That was sweet... but I've heard, and seen a lot of what she does... and it kind of scares me. I never hoped to have to encounter her, but now my only friend is looking up to /her/. Of course, I told him, and he seemed a bit bummed the rest of the day. I didn't mean to hurt his feelings at all, but I don't want him to get hurt. I made sure he was okay throughout our breaks, but he just nodded and moved on. I was doubtful, and ashamed. Maybe I should've kept it to myself. Though no matter what I told myself, I just felt so incredibly uncomfortable with him. They started dating, and the past few months Rowan had been so focused on her, and every time he tried to invite me over where she was, I just had to distance myself. She has people fearing her in this school, I don't wanna fear her for whatever reason the others have... It really hurt me, and I couldn't take it anymore. Rowan wasn't getting the hint, was it selfish to be bothered? I don't know if I just wanted attention, but I wanted him to notice I was sad. He didn't notice though. So I went up to him, trying to be serious with him like I was taught to be in these situations. I told him, I just couldn't be involved with her, and I'd still be his friend but she wouldn't be my mutual... I don't know how he took it, but he slammed his locker and walked away from me, so I think I understood clearly by then. I was wrong for that. Was looking out for a friend a crime? That night, I just could hardly sleep. My parents were yelling and arguing, I guess father was drjnkjng again. I flopped over my bed and hid my whole face with my pillow, letting out exhausted groans 'till I eventually /did/ fall asleep. The next morning, Rowan seemed to have been staring at me. All day. I assumed he was still angry at me, but he seemed to not be talking with Christine much today, odd. I survived the rest of the day, luckily, and once the last bell rang - I burst to my locker, hoping to just hurry up and finally head home. Although, a familiar voice was heard from behind me. It was Rowan? He tapped me, and requested to talk. I agreed, of course, and he was leading me to what he was was the restroom. Lie. He pushed me, unexpectedly, into a classroom nearby in the direction of the bathrooms; it was empty, and the teacher seemed to have left the room. I was very confused, obviously, why was he so aggressive with that push? And why is he blocking the door? I glanced behind myself to see, and there she was. Christine. I guess it was the time I understood why she's so feared. She asked me personal /personal/ questions. It was extremely bugging me, I don't recall at all telling kids here about my personal life. I tried to ask her to stop and I tried to leave. But Rowan hit me. Hard. He hit me until I fell on the ground, and slammed his fist into my eye several times. Stinging. Pain. It hurt. I remember that feeling. From youth. This wasn't friendship. It was so hard to see, and to process that moment. All I saw was red in my right eye, and tears bursting from both. I woke up in a hospital, apparently I passed out for 2 days. I just sat there in my thoughts awhile. I couldn't see well out of my right eye, almost seeing pitch black. After a week, I was back. I didn't snitch. I didn't talk. Kids found humor in me Flinching I was a freak Because everyone knew my weakness ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
