048. Wowee look guys

Instructions

Halfmoonkit stared into the clear water, her eyes narrowed that the figure staring back up at her. She narrowed her eyes more, although they were barely slits now. “ I’m not right” she meowed softly, she was surprised at her own words. What could that mean? Lately she had felt confused, like something was off. Like she wasn’t what she was supposed to be. Was it her new feathers? No, she liked those. No, this was something else, this wasn’t physical discomfort, this was mental. What in Starclan was it? She was so frustrated, the answer seemed to be right in front of them, just visible, yet it was also millions of miles away, invisible to all. Halfmoonkit clawed the shore, a mix of wet sand and soil. She thought about other cats, what had they changed about themselves. Most cats changed their appearance, that was normal, but this couldn’t be an appearance thing, this was purely a mental bother. “ I’m not right “ she repeated, a touch louder, it was dark, the others were sleeping, she knew no one could hear her. Her eyes stung with wet, hot tears sliding down her cheeks. She watched them fall and hit the water, sending small waves that deteriorated before they got to the shore. She peered into the stream, it was as clear as a mirror, it looked so delicate, like it would shatter at her touch. “ Hello “ she meowed, staring the cat in the eyes. “ My name is Halfmoonkit. I use she / her / hers pronouns. “ she meowed, using the recalled line she had stole from her friends. Then it dawned on her, or maybe not her? She didn’t like that, being labeled as a female and only a female, she felt like that wasn’t right. That feminine pronouns weren’t right. “ Hello. My name is Halfmoonkit. I use “ she paused, what pronouns did she like? She partly wanted to keep she/her pronouns, that leaving them would be leaving apart of her, but she wasn’t full, she wasn’t right yet. He. That was another pronoun she knew, did masculine pronouns sound right? I guess they kind of fit him but she still didn’t feel whole. They/them pronouns. Those were the only three she had really been exposed to, they sounded about right for.. them? “ Hello. My name is Halfmoonkit. I use she/him/theirs pronouns. “ she meowed, a smile began to spread across their face. “ I’m right “ she meowed, this time talking to the other side of the fragile water. This was a voluntary decision to speak, not his subconscious suggestions from earlier. They got up and padded away from the stream that snaked through camp, curling up beside her sister. Slowly getting floated away by the clouds of sleep that seemed to surround him.